We are all cray. And a little tip from us cray cray girls: don't mention "that time of the month" ever...unless you want to be stabbed in the dick with an eyeliner pencil.

All of my co-workers are females and, each one is bonafide cray-cray. This one I'm looking at right now is around 24 and she's a thick chick. Pretty too. I've been with a few skinny broads but I love me some thick chicks. We get along great. Introduced me to Mr. Robot. I introduced her to [url=http://www.emuparadise.me/]ROMS[/url] On like her 2nd or 3rd week we did the office luncheon thing to welcome the new person. Well this undercover psycho, had us leave the restaurant because there's no Vegan options. Vegan my hairy ass. I had my mouth all ready for oily pizzeria pizza too. She's like 5'4" and weighs around 200lbs I'm thinking. Crazy ass. Another one around here somewhere is without a doubt is the prettiest librarian I've ever seen. Late 30s. Very, very nice on the eyes and dresses quite lovely. Always smells delicious. She smelled like -blam!-ing waffles yesterday! She has to walk with a cane tho, because she broke her hip or thigh or something. Anyways, one of my friend's friends dated her, like 3 or 4 years ago. He tells me, she doesn't do oral (deal breaker) and he said she's nasty in the kitchen. Said she lets her [b]multiple [/b]cats on the counter while she cooks and that he pulled more than 5 pieces of hair out of his mouth in one meal and ran for the hills. Cats on the counter? No kisses you know where?? Ever??? Fuk outta here. And now I refuse to eat anything she brings for a Pot Luck. Just last month one of our co-workers was pulling hairs out of a piece of cake she made. Tsk tsk tsk. Another one, in her late 50s is a man hating crone. Her ex-husband left her for a much younger woman, like younger than their 30 something year old daughter. She too, has cane..but her's is because she had a stroke a few years ago. I'm a librarian btw...sometimes we do talks or information sessions where we'll explain how to research a subject like Genealogy or the Civil War. She hasn't had a single session yet, where someone (both men and women) hasn't left a comment, complaining about her sexist anecdotes...of course she's the one who reads the comments and laughs at em. Saying "man up" or "take it like a man". She uses the same census slides each time to show this one man had several kids with different women and how those poor women probably never knew. Ugh. She's toxic. She (and another) told the other one with the cane, that one guy she was dating was a loser because he was "just a lazy security guard". Once said to me that I was "too old to be a little boy" because I was playing games at work. I told her she had a dried up, grouchy coochie. After years of working together, I can say things like that to her. But 10 years now...and no one, NOBODY, has come knocking at that door. This other one, is a short haired, skinny robot, with OCD. Every. Single. Day. For about 10+ years now, she goes to lunch at precisely 11:45. She sits at the SAME table, in the SAME spot, eats a PB&J(am) and reads a book, in the same hair style. Even when she's giving a lecture, that lecture breaks for lunch at 11:35. She's got over 2k hours of sick leave and each year, they [b]make [/b]her take about 3 weeks off. No kids and owns Zero TVs! Calls TV the "Idiot Box". She's read the Game of Thrones Books, but refuses to even see the show. This, woman, said Netflix and video games are for lazy, uneducated people. Just now, while typing this I was asked by the crone to "help" move 12 cases of paper. How is it "help" if I move all 12 damn boxes by myself? Men are useless, unless she needs a bunch of boxed moved. Why the shit didn't one of these smart ass women have the paper dropped off in the right spot to begin with?

Pro tip: They're all crazy, brother.

Ever try Christian Mingle? been hearing good things about the network. [spoiler]Oh shit wrong commercial[/spoiler]

[quote]Seems I always get the really crazy ones. They act nice and normal then suddenly its like Harley Quinn fused with She-Hulk. No it wasn't that time of the month. Goes to show you that even the good guys don't get a happily ever after.[/quote] This thread is definitely ran by a 14 year old kid who thinks he's a good guy and deserves a perfect girl. You need to reevaluate your life

You allready have 2. Left and right)