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Edited by Uncle Filthy: 2/8/2016 1:12:58 PM
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My friend stole something from me

She stole my hoodie, and she wont give it back. Give me a something to say to here to get my hoodie back
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  • Edited by SeAWeEd1998: 2/11/2016 3:08:05 PM
    Tell her u wipe ur dick with that hoodie after u masturbate

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    • Edited by Stargazer_Lily: 2/9/2016 3:33:55 AM
      Wait a week then tell her your smell probably is off it now. And to give it back so you can put that manly smell back on it that she wants.

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      • [b]A Synth Approaches[/b] Call her a TRAITOR and proceed to spill hot coffee on her.

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        • Edited by Aeksrener: 2/9/2016 1:35:32 AM
          Say "For all that's right for (her god or one of her gods) gimme back my hoodie"

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          • Edited by Wow I Jake: 2/8/2016 11:49:05 PM
            "U wan sum fuk bby?"

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            • Give me my hoodie back, please.

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              • If she steals it and won't give it back she's not your friend.. You can also tell her or your parents and they will unleash hell on her if she won't give it back

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                • That you will take her to superdry and but her one

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                  • *Prepares laser face* It's gone.

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                    • If you want to be a savage[spoiler]Hey, thanks for stretching my sweater for me. It was too tight for me.[/spoiler]

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                      • Pay her 20 bucks?

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                        • Edited by atomicdonkey28: 2/8/2016 8:14:22 PM
                          Honestly I can't think of anything and I don't know why

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                          • I gonna call the police

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                            • Tell her she has AIDS now.

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                              • Post pic. Let me wife her. I take off her goodie as we engage in sexytimes. You get your goodie back. I get a wife. Its a win win.

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                                • -Be 19 -Living in my college town -Doing school things -Works at IHOP -Because college town, pancake joint be swinging -A group of four guys come in every night -Three are nice and tip well -One asshole -Asshole always gets six pancakes -After two months of dealing with them cannotdeal.jpg -Asshole's magnitude far outweighs his friends' likability -Slowly developing cancer from asshole radiation -He seems like he hasn't mentally evolved yet -Likely bordering retard status -Huge muskills though -Instead of going for direct confrontation, I make a decision -I am slowly and methodically going to -blam!- his mind -Every night, one pancake gets more penis-like in nature -About 4-6 degrees on the floppy Johnson every day -realslowlike.gif -Because I introduce the dickcake slowly he doesn't notice for awhile -I watch happily and giddily as he chokes the cockcake down -It begins to be the centerpiece of my day -He finally notices after it is a straight up honkin' dick -Added whipped cream at the end of the blueberry urethra -Theresastormcoming.jpg -One fateful night I personally deliver the dickcake -He looks me dead in the face and asks me -"Hey," *Deciphers nametag (Letters hurt him)* "A-an-no-on, Anon What is this shit?" -idontknow.jpg -"You better start talking or I'll talk to your manager." -Manager... We'll refer to him as "C" -C is my best friend -dastardlyplot.jpg -"I'll go get him for you -blam!- sir." -I sneak in " -blam!-" because I'm feeling extra alpha -He notices, not happy -I approach C and explain everything -He rotflmaobbqs all of it, every detail -He is in on the conspiracy now -Props to C for his improv work - He sneaks in about nine penis related puns into his talk with asshole -*Paraphrasing* "Sir, we don't just dick around back here. My employees didn't mess with your junk. You need more evidence than one penis shaped pancake" -Other tables hear and enjoy giggles -I'm dying in the kitchen -Asshole scowls, pays, and walks out -getlawyered.jpg -No way this mother-blam!-er will come back tomorrow -Just in case, C gets everyone on our shift in on it --blam!-er comes back -Sits in different zone so he doesn't need to deal with me -Doesn't matter -This was our night to bring hundreds of Phallic references into culinary form -An army of workers ready to bring penis into every open conversation -We were armed and ready -It was no ordinary penis assault -This was the All Hallows Eve of cock -All us workers replaced our nametags with a penis reference -Chuck, Dick, Peter, Johnson, and the asian busboy? Dong -We all stuffed to front of our pants with socks to give a noticeable bulge -We plan the attack in waves -Phase one begins -"Johnson" takes orders waving bulge in assholes face -Asshole's order: Mother -blam!-ing Pancakes -fool.jpg -Cue "Dick" -He brings drinks, spilling asshole's on his cock region -Total improv -"Dick" furiously cleans his pants inches form asshole's face -Uproar in the kitchen -Other tables are getting shitty service this evening -#Worth -Two more waves pass -Asshole stands -Kitchen goes silent -He walks to the kitchen -Dohshit -TROOLINTHEDUNGEON.gif -We scatter -C takes over and calms him down -Should have been a counselor -Commence final wave -Asshole had seen "Dong" clean up "Dick's" spill and had caught wind of out nametags after that -I stroll out -He looks pissed as -blam!- -I hand him not one, but six straight up cocks, no disputing -Bacon pubes, Cherry herpes, Whipped cream jizz -My nametag for this evening? -Penis -He rages and punches me cold -Wake up in the hospital -All employees standing around my bed -Wake up to applause -Broken nose -Still #Worth -Never see asshole again -From that point on, we where know as IHOC -International House Of Cock

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                                  • Plot twist the hoodie is ops virginity.

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                                    • If you want to destroy my sweater… pull this thread as I walk away! (AS I WALK AWAY)

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                                      • Where da hood at?

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                                        • Take her big black dildo! Then use it as blackmail!

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                                          • Pm me her pic

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                                            • Tell her that she wont wear it late at night to the gas station to get a yoohoo and some skittles...

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                                              • Tell her that youve been wiping your butt all day and all night with that hoodie :D

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                                                • Take her virginity.

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                                                  • I use the left arm of that hoodie to wipe myself after fapping, so we could get laid if you want, we've already broken the ice, you know? My place tonight? Bring the hoodie with you.

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                                                    • Give it to me or I will forever follow you through the school going MEAHHHHHH

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