Because bikinis are meant to swim in, the woman knows people are able to see her, so she tries to look as good as possible.
Underwear, meant to be worn under clothes, not intended for others to see, women don't care how they look in underwear (it's usually bad) so they are embarrassed.
It's not hard to understand, why men still ask this baffles me.
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This implies that if women would just care more about how they look in undies, that it would be acceptable.