I actually believe him. And I feel for him. He is still gay. He is forcing himself into denial and into a lifestyle contrary to who he is. Living a lie. He describes being ready to kill himself, and not knowing if he is saved or not. To me that means he was raised with a heavy indoctrination into the religion. He was told over and over again that what he felt was wrong, and that he was going to hell for it. He chose to live this lie because he fears being hell and being without his family's love more than he does the psychological damage of denying who he is. If you want a for real Jesus saves me from _____, find me an atheist, or Hindu or even a Buddhist that was gay, never thought anything was wrong with it, and suddenly turned straight when they found Jesus. What we have been shown is what happens when one is raised in a strict Christian lifestyle and strays from it, and reacts to how their family treats them afterwards.