I was only 9 years old >I loved Thorn so much, I had all the grimoire cards and 3d printed replicas >I pray to Thorn every night before bed, thanking him for the kills I've been given >"Thorn is love" I say; "Thorn is life" >My dad hears me and calls me a noob >I know he was just jealous of my 2 headshot kills >I called him a scrub >He blink shotguns me and sends me to go play rumble with NLB >I'm crying now, and my KD hurts >I lay in bed and it's really cold >Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me >It's Thorn >I am so happy >It whispers into my ear "pchng pchng" >It downs my shields with its DoT and puts me down onto my hands and knees >I'm ready >I spread my ass-cheeks for Thorn >It penetrates my butt-hole >It hurts so much but I do it for Thorn >I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water >I push against his force >I want to please Thorn >It fires in a mighty pchng as it fills my butt with his DoT >My dad walks in >Thorn looks him straight in the eyes and says "git gud scrub" >Thorn leaves and hides in my vault >Thorn is love. Thorn is life.