I'm a virgin but I get loads of girls.
You aren't bothering me, which is why I keep replying.
No, you.
I'm an armed guard to my parent's basement.
I've never even kissed a girl, but I post pictures of girls bottoms because I think I am cool, as opposed to a tragic no lifer.
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No girls would want you. You obviously are bothered, squirt. You've gone incoherent. You're too incompetent to be a guard of any kind. Sounds about right. Good thing I post actually good pictures because I actually am cool! :P
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You're too incompetent to be anything other than a guard. You are paid to wait, why do you think this is something to brag about? Hurrrr durrr, I earn minimum wage in a shitty, dead end job being a security guard. You're all jealous and stupid, derrrrrrrrrp.
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The only one incompetent is yourself, which is why you can't do security. I'm paid to protect, which anyone with principle would appreciate. I don't "brag" about it but I appreciate your assumption that I was. Nice fantasy, but you couldn't get a job. And $55,000 is definitely not minimum wage.
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What's life like on your planet?
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You're already running out of responses? You were wrong from the start, but even I am surprised with how fast you became incompetent and incoherent. You must have had a botched lobotomy.