[quote]The ideal of "father" is not something we are trained to carry into our future as we mature into adult hood. Rather, we enter into adult life with vague ambitions of financial success through aspecialized career.[/quote] You can check the [url=https://www.epi.org/child-care-costs-in-the-united-states/]costs and statistics on childcare in your state here[/url] (rip if you live in DC). Meanwhile, [url=https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/08/millennials-are-screwed-recession/596728/]this is the economic situation of Millennials[/url]. Costs are continuing to rise every single year; the US has no universal policy for paid family leave or childcare; and [url=https://www.kff.org/health-costs/press-release/benchmark-employer-survey-finds-average-family-premiums-now-top-20000/]average costs for family health insurance[/url] are not only rising, but rising faster than wages, and currently sitting at $6,000 for premiums alone under an employer plan. I am fortunate enough to be in a situation where I can plan for a family in the next few years. I look forward to being a father. I would not shame or insult other men as "shirking their destiny" for not having the privilege of doing the same*. (edit) *I thought the OP meant "shirking" having kids at all, vs. shirking your responsibility once you have one-- my bad