Okay, this is fixable. Go ahead and see if you have the manuals and packaging from your console.
Put everything you have back into the box with cables and controllers, and take it back to the store where you bought it with the receipt.
When the clerk asks you why you want to return it... Tell them that you're too stupid to own a console and too stupid to play this game.
Afterwards, go buy a cabin (or build one) and do society a favor and -blam!- off.