So my friend called me and said she had gone into labour and her dirtbag boyfriend wouldn't be able to come to the birthing ceremony because he was hanging out with friends sniffing catnip (some drug slang, I dunno' ), so she asked me to attend as I'm a guy lol. It was pretty icky, but she let me name her child because she was going to break up with her boyfriend anyway and the boy needs a fathor. Everyone, say hello to Mittens 64 !