I liked the first chapter better. I'm not going to lie, "lone wolf", is played out. Try setting yourself apart from the "norm", if you will. "Nomad", "Transient", "Drifter", "Wanderer", Hell, I would even try "Rolling Stone". Branching out from everyday word usage, will really help you stand out. Also, when writing dialogue, such as: "I am going to be leading this fire team." She said as she stormed in. Instead of ending the dialogue with a period inside of the quotations, it is correctly written as: "I am going to be leading this fire team," she said as she stormed in. You aren't starting a new sentence after she speaks, it is a continuation of the same sentence, so therefore, a comma. However, if you aren't going to say anything else after the dialogue, then ending it with a period inside of the quotations is correct. "John, go to the store and buy milk." John didn't want to go, but he stopped playing Destiny and went anyway. Just a few things I saw, very minor, and very common. Anyway, keep it going, your story is solid!