Considering most raids center around not dying, I'd say self-rez is fine. It is certainly better to not die in the first place but no one can guarantee you that. DPS comes from rockets + snipers, not necessarily from supers; they're more for clearing mobs which a rocket or grenade can easily replace. I play with randoms quite a bit and it is reassuring to have warlocks that can self-rez. In random groups, there isn't much team strategy/cohesion anyways lol...I'd say dying lets your team down more than anything else.
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I don't mind wiping...in fact, random groups tend to wipe a lot haha. The completion rate of any raid is higher *in random groups* when warlocks are present (unless crota- they're useless...I don't know why people don't use voidwalker there). I think the benefit of self-rez is so crucial for Atheon especially for the less experienced teams.
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I apologize, I was talking more in the context of hard Atheon since that is what I run...on normal you can do whatever to pass time haha. I do agree with you that everyone should learn their roles but some people are just so slow at learning. They refuse to acknowledge that the relic is easy to use lol. I had a group where this guy keep taking the relic and dies every time on Mars (or Past Venus). After the 10th wipe, with 1 time getting really close to killing atheon, I told him to just not to take the relic anymore lol.