Nobody knows the story of the vault of glass pioneers. But, that is not the point of this story. It was a stormy day in September. The day we chose to attempt to complete the ultimate challenge of destiny. The vault of glass. We braved through all of the obstacles. We started with the spire, which puzzled us for a time, then the confluxes. The most challenging of all was Atheon. We were stuck on Atheon, and nobody in our fireteam had to go anytime soon. I was the designated relic holder. We eventually exhausted all of your synths, and we were all tired of the experience. "One last attempt." We had Atheon down to half health when suddenly, I heard the crash of thunder outside. "Noooooo!!" I screamed. I prayed to RNGesus with all of my heart, that I wouldn't get disconnected. But it was too late. My screen went dark, and the dreaded red and gray bar appeared. "Contacting destiny servers." It read. "Get good scrub." My team started to panic, because they did not know how to use the relic. When suddenly we saw: SmoggyPluto has joined your fireteam. Yes, there were seven of us, in our fireteam, on the vault of glass. He spawned in with a roar that turned to the sound of laughter. "Not today." My fireteam screaming, overwhelmed by Atheon's blasts. He ran over to my fireteam and popped a bubble that gave us both weapons and blessing of light. I was mesmerized, but I knew I wouldn't last. I was going to disconnect. When, suddenly, SmoggyPluto ran over to me, reached, and pulled the disconnect bar off of my screen and loaded it into his Sleeper Stimulant. He then jumped into the sky, a quadruple Titan jump. He jumped so high, he absorbed the light from the glass, and shot the disconnect bar into Atheon, ripping him apart. Before we got rewards, he urinated over Atheon's dead body, and said "become legend guardian." Smoggy Pluto has left your fireteam. We were all rewarded Vex Mythoclasts. Two arc, two solar, and two void. Smoggy Pluto shall rise again, guardians. Mark my words.

It was a stormy day in may, i was playing the level 35 prison of elders and we were fighting Skolas, this was our last attempt... We had exhausted all our heavy ammo synthesis in the previous rounds and and were making one last daring attempt. We had Skolas down to 50% health when i heard a loud thunder strike outside. "NO!" i screamed but it was too late the red and grey bar had appeared at the bottom of my screen. "Attempting to reconnect." It read. [b]"Get gud scrub"[/b] It thundered all around me, outside and inside the game. Lighting flashed all around my house blinding me, when i regained my vision this is what i saw: "SmoggyPluto has joined your fireteam." I frantically checked my screen and sure enough he was there in our fireteam, 4 in our fireteam... He spawned in with a monstrous roar that turned to a low chuckle... [b]"not today."[/b] he said. He ran to my unmoving gl itching form; my teammates screaming overwhelmed with adds. He spawned a bubble that gave us both weapons and blessing of light. I was astounded but knew that i would not last long enough... I was going to disconnect... When suddenly SmoggyPluto reached through my screen and grabbed the disconnect bar... I couldn't believe what was happening. He grabbed the bar as if it was a stick, pulled it off my screen and loaded it into his Gjallarhorn, He then jumped into the sky, a quartic jump, 5 JUMPS, he got so high he absorbed the sun and then in one swoop shot the disconnect bar into Skolas tearing him apart into nothing. The wolfpack rounds then proceed to swarm and destroy the mines we were supposed to [i]dismantle[/i] He stayed with us all the way to the treasure room but did not speak. Finally he urinated on the large chest and turned to us and said [b]"become legend gaurdian."[/b] [i]SmoggyPluto has left your fireteam[/i]. speechless me and my fireteam all opened the pee-stained chest... We all received 3 Gjallarhorns... One void, one arc, and one solar, all already fully maxed [i]all hail SmoggyPluto[/i]

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