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6/20/2015 6:39:38 AM
92
First time masturbating...
What was it to?
Do you remember?
Was there Internet readily at your fingertips?
When I first masturbated, the Internet wasn't a thing really, not like it is now.. in every home.
I can't really remember but I'll bet it was Hustler.
I'm looking for odd and funny first time masturbating stories. Maybe I just want to make fun of you.
Anyway, Vice did an article where they asked people what they masturbated to for the first time and I found it pretty... interesting.
Go on.
English
#Offtopic
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1 ReplyMorgan Freeman's voice always rustled my jimmies.
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5 RepliesOh I remember vividly. I was 11 (2004) and my father, his gf, and I were vacationing on the margarita islands off the coast of Venezuela. I was left alone in the hotel room for a while one night so I decided to cut on the tv to kill some time. I channel surfed for a while and decided to stick with inuyasha. I lay there on the bed with my only my underwear watching an innocent anime. I don't know if there was a racy scene or maybe the camera caught the perfect angle of Kagome's skirt when suddenly my underwear tented. Now this wasn't the fist time I had an erection but for whatever reason I instinctively began to stroke it a little. Not long after the stroking and Kagome's skirt was more than I could handle. It was a quick but sharp pleasure sensation and I stood there breathlessly. I had absolutely no idea what this white stuff excreted from my little man was. I didn't know what was happening to me so naturally I began to worry. I swore I'd never do it again. The following day I jerked it three times. That entire vacation period I probably pumped my rod enough to power a 7/11. I practically jerked it anywhere I could; in the shower, in the bathroom, in the ocean, in the pool bar behind a bench. I was insatiable. After a few years I calmed down. I don't think I every fapped as much as did in Venezuela though. Pls no h8
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Edited by Doc: 6/20/2015 10:01:40 PMLet's just say we were 12, I went to my mates house and he showed me a video from a site called Jugg World, so yeah, going home later that day was apparently quite the treat
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2 RepliesEdited by GrandmaBanjo69: 6/20/2015 9:36:57 PMIn 1998 I went on a boating trip with a friend's family and we were tubing on this weird banana thing that you ride like a motorcycle. Like this thing: [url=http://www.inflatable-water-sports.com/UploadFile/Picture/2015-3/2015313163426756.jpg]banana tube[/url] Anyway, the water was choppy and the rhythmic movement caused a hilariously misplaced orgasm. I had no idea what was happening and it scared me so bad I fell off the bananatube. Edit: and then after that I was obsessed.
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6 RepliesI don't even need to explain.
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I was watching that Shoveldog gif
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2 RepliesThat move I Spy, I must've been like 11 or 12? It was a sexual scene between Ashton Kutcher and a lady, I think.
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I really don't remember what I was looking at but good god the height the ejaculate reached could be picked up on radar,
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3 RepliesI'm a sperm and what is this?
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5 RepliesWhere's dat first time menstruating parody thread at?
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7 RepliesDidn't you already make a thread like this a while back?
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Sports Illustrated swimsuit calender, wasn't even in my home. I don't really remember the axt as much as the item I jerked it to. It was around the time where Internet started to be better and more widespread, but not readily available to me. I miss that calendar.
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1 ReplyFirst time was to one of the few sex scenes in delis advocate, prior to the internet I had to make use of dvd's, I probably should have closed the blinds because my neighbor saw me (even though I was on the 2nd floor) Suffice it to say I should have locked the front door she came rushing in leaving me with literally just enough time for me to put my junk away and turn off the tv
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Wtf r u talkin about i had s3x with mai s3x ed teecher 2 times. Iz liek ur offendin me or sumtin
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Edited by tuckers baby: 6/20/2015 5:12:03 PM12 or 13 My undies were plastered together.[spoiler]It was yellow and I was scared.[/spoiler]
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Edited by XSEAN : 6/20/2015 8:44:25 PMFine when I was a teen a couple of my classmate would pull pranks on kids who left their computers during computer class. They would go to a porn site then turn off the monitor. The victim would sit down turn then monitor back on and bam porn everywhere. Fast forward a few months I am in puberty and horny. One day after school no one home I was horny and went to the site. I did not want to see penises so I clicked on a lesbian video. It was 2 blonds acting like school girls. My rocket was solid and I put my hand on it and it felt good until I got the beat.
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15 RepliesOh my gosh I feel so weird sharing this... Okay, so I was in 7th grade, and I didn't even know what sex was. All I knew was that one of my teachers was really hot. (Yeah I know it's already weird. Don't worry, she's like 25 or something). So I was thinking about making out with her. I wasn't even thinking of having sex with her (because I didn't know what that was as mentioned earlier). So I thought it would be a good idea to just make out with my pillow. And I did. I was rolling around in my bed while making out with my pillow, and I realized that my d*** was getting hard. As it rubbed against the pillow I realized that it felt good... Really good. So I continued doing this for a while, and as you can imagine, I eventually orgasmed. It FREAKED ME OUT. I had no idea what was going on with my body. I thought I was peeing or something and I tried to hold it in, but doing so just made it hurt. I cleaned it up and didn't tell my parents. I just stayed in bed shaking wondering if I was sick or something. (I had a lot of anxiety as a kid). It wasn't until a lot later that I found out what had happened, and then I started again and now that I don't fight it, it's fun. And I've been doing it ever since. Well I hope you enjoyed the story. I seriously can't believe that I'm about to post this... In fact I might not at all... But I spent like 5 minutes writing that so I don't want it all to go to waste... So... Eh screw it. I'll post. [spoiler]Also, please don't judge. I know it's a weird story.[/spoiler]
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*sips coffee*
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I was in the bathroom, like 13 or something. Just used imagination.
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As a kid I was flipping through channels looking for the show Celebrity Death match. I couldn't find it, but I found something better instead :) HBO at night giggity
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No Internet, American Pie was on. Nadia scene, she was so hot dude
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1 ReplyI remember quite clearly, I was 11 or 12, playing hitman. I shot a house maid in one of the missions and as I walked past I noticed her legs were spread. I just looked for a few minutes, got my imagination going, went to the bathroom and the rest is history. [spoiler]I'm not a necropheliac, I promise.[/spoiler]
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Edited by Commander Zavala: 6/20/2015 8:15:07 PMf*ck I don't even [i]remember[/i]
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I think the first thing I masturbated to was a video of codi milo and brea Bennett 10/10
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I was home alone and the computer was there so I did what any other twelve year old would have done
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7 Replies[quote]What was it to?[/quote]My imagination. There wasn't anything else to work with at the time. [quote]Do you remember? [/quote]Vividly. Dark room, summer, no AC, lying on top of the sheets, trying not to make noise and avoid squeaking bedsprings. Due to my lack on technique and it being my first time, it was awkward and balanced between enjoyment and worry. When it was over, my chest, face and the headboard were a mess. I had to strip off a pillowcase to clean up. [quote]Was there Internet readily at your fingertips? [/quote]There wasn't any Internet, and the only access to porn was either finding it in abandoned buildings (where older kids or the homeless stashed it) or finding another kid who had located his dad's or uncle's magazine stash. If that wasn't possible (and many times it wasn't) there was the Sears catalog with the women's undergarment section. [quote]When I first masturbated, the Internet wasn't a thing really, not like it is now.. in every home. [/quote]I think that back pre-Internet that finding visual examples of sex, sexiness, and porn was far less pervasive and easy. But we were just as horny, just as hormone driven as any adolescents. So while we didn't have resources as explicit and as simple to find as the Internet, we made do. Imagination, finding eroticism in the slightest of things, and since we were "free range kids", young to mid teens, we did a lot of mutual exploration and found other kids who were just as curious, just as hormonally addled and just as horny as we. [quote]I can't really remember but I'll bet it was Hustler. [/quote]Finding porn that was more explicit than Playboy wasn't easy or common. Penthouse was like finding buried treasure and the first time I ever saw Hustler or real hardcore (which was stills from European/Dutch films) I was mesmerized and amazed. [quote]I'm looking for odd and funny first time masturbating stories.[/quote]I don't know how odd or funny my experiences were. But they were awkward, they were intense, they were formative and it was the beginning of a lifelong fascination with sex, human sexuality, and how various people see, treat and find joy in this aspect of being human. [quote] Maybe I just want to make fun of you. [/quote] Oh there are plenty of face-palm and blushable stories in my life. More than can fit in a B.Net text window.
