Ok... I posted this back in 2015 (Don't ask me how I found it). It mostly rings true today... Apart from the Queen part (But we all know she's alive somewhere... Right?) And as for her brother... Well, let's not let the facts get in the way here. [b]Part 1:[/b] 1: Bang Rahool. 2: Punch the Queen in the face. 3: Sit down. Try to figure out how I messed those two things up. 4: Apologise to Rahool, then punch him in the face. 5: Apologise to the Queen. Bang her brother... No... Wait. 6: Apologise to her brother. Apologise to the Queen again. Bang the Queen (YES! Finally) 6: Huh? 7: Kill another Guardian and take their Vault space. 8: Get caught for killing another Guardian. 9: Get sent to the Prison of Elders. 10: Urrox makes me his b!tch... Oouuch. 11: Gradually impress the Warden... Yesssss? Win his trust. Assassinate him and escape. 12: Go to Mars to hide out (cos no-one ever goes there anymore). 13: Find a nice Cabal bride, settle down and raise half breed abominations that will one day turn on me and "try to take over the world". [spoiler]Please comment if you would like me to add [b]Part 2:[/b][/spoiler] Due to an overwhelming response... [spoiler]Actually only TY KLR requested this 😢[/spoiler] Here's................... [b]Part 2:[/b] 14: Wake up from horrible dream... Roll over... Speaker? WTF 15: Find Eva Levante and take her up on her standing offer... Lol... "Standing offer" 16: Pen a letter to Oryx explaining our huge mistake in killing his son... - Sign it "Atheon" 17: Track down the "Stranger". Hit her over the head when she turns her back... Tie her up... "You got time to explain now b!tch!" 18: Go see Eris... Explain that I enjoy Omnigul's screams during our "sexy time" and that I have no intention of silencing them. [spoiler]Bang Eris... Silence [u][b]her screams[/b][/u][/spoiler] 19: Set a trap for Nolanbot... 20: Come to a sudden stop on my way to "The Divide" while on my sparrow... WTF? 21: Hunt down the "Architects"... Cue [b]that[/b] scene from Reservoir Dogs. 22: Take their Pikes... Sell Pikes... Get money... Get B!tches... Make it rain. 23: Put both Cryptarch's in a cage together... Thunderdome style. 24: Bang the Queen[spoiler]'s emissary... Because she's a chick with an eye patch... AN EYE PATCH![/spoiler] 25: Wee in my armor to see if it works like Master Chief's... [spoiler]Just found out... It doesn't[/spoiler] 26: Keep armor on... Yolo