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Editado por Spawn:
9/14/2016 1:37:31 PM
135
Tell me a joke
Topic
Tell me a joke.
[spoiler]Rise of iron is next week for relevance[/spoiler]
Jokes are getting better and better.
[spoiler]Moderator edit: This thread has been moved to #Offtopic, a more appropriate forum for this offtopic discussion.
Feel free to private message the moderator who moved your post, link to topic, for further clarification about why this topic was moved.[/spoiler]
English
#Offtopic
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2 RespuestasRise of Iron [spoiler]jk I'm hyped[/spoiler]
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3 RespuestasWhat's the best way to deal with dyslexic criminals? [spoiler]Give them a long sentence[/spoiler]
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1 RespuestaI have a good joke! The entire plot of Year 1!
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1 RespuestaWhat do you do when a woman gets hit by a car? [spoiler]Wonder what the car was doing in the kitchen.[/spoiler]
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I've got the best joke ever [spoiler]my life[/spoiler]
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2 RespuestasAn Englisman, a Frenchman, and an American are captured by Indians. They are told that they will be eaten and have their skin used to make canoes but, get to choose how they die. The Englishman asks for a sword. He is handed one and exclaims, "God save the Queen", as he runs himself through. Next the Frenchman asks for a pistol. Yells "Vive La France" and shoots himself in the head. The American simply asks for a fork. Puzzled the Indians hand him a fork. The American starts stabbing himself with the fork screaming, "So much for your :blaming: canoe!"
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Respond and I will edit my fave joke in here
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4 RespuestasShow spoiler
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See there were two guys in an asylum. One day, they decide they'd had enough of all that. They make it to the roof and across the way are all the other rooftops, stretching to freedom. The first guy, he makes it ok, but the other guy, no way, he's afraid to fall. The first guy then says "hey I'll use this flash light to light the way so you can walk on the light across. The other goes, "what do you think I am, crazy? You'd just turn the flashlight off before I get across. Heh....excuse me....
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Helen Keller walks into a bar.[spoiler]Then a chair[/spoiler][spoiler]Then a table [/spoiler][spoiler]Then her grave.[/spoiler]
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1 RespuestaHow do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed [spoiler]put velcro on the ceiling[/spoiler] [spoiler]lol I know I'm going to piss someone off[/spoiler]
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2 RespuestasWhat do you call a Horny Ghost ;) HARDLIGHT ;)
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Editado por Art Vandelay: 9/16/2016 10:56:47 PMWhy do they use Mexicans instead of laboratory rats in experiments now? [spoiler]Mexicans breed faster and you don’t get so attached to them.[/spoiler]
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What do you call an Indian dating service? [spoiler]Connect the dots.[/spoiler]
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What do you get when you cross a black guy with an octopus? [spoiler]I don't know but it sure could pick a lot of cotton.[/spoiler]
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How do you know Jesus wasn't born in Mexico? [spoiler]Because in Mexico you'll never find three wise men and a virgin.[/spoiler]
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What's the difference between a black guy and an elevator? [spoiler]An elevator can actually raise a child.[/spoiler]
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Why do pill bottles have cotton on top? [spoiler]To remind black people that they were once cotton pickers before they were drug dealers.[/spoiler]
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3 Respuestas[quote]This is according the advanced research, the funniest joke ever. Seriously, university of hertfordshire did alot of research on this. Enjoy: "Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence; then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?""[/quote] -nallimokmok
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5 Respuestas"Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip, and after finishing their dinner they retire for the night, and go to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." "I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes" exclaims Watson. "And what do you deduce from that?" Watson ponders for a minute. "Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?" "Watson, you idiot!" he exclaims, "Somebody's stolen our tent!" " Now for a history joke: How many potates does it take to kill an irishman? None. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Famine_(Ireland)
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2 RespuestasConfucius say Man who make mistake in elevator He wrong on many levels
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Editado por Cyber_219: 9/17/2016 2:49:49 AMa joke[spoiler]Sorry[/spoiler][spoiler]What do you call the inside of a funny egg?[/spoiler][spoiler]A joke[/spoiler]
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1 RespuestaWhy doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? [spoiler]All the Mexicans that can run, jump, and swim have already crossed the border.[/spoiler]
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Editado por Art Vandelay: 9/16/2016 11:06:16 PMA black man a Mexican are riding in a car together. Who is driving? [spoiler]A cop.[/spoiler]
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You were born. [spoiler]Spamming the forums since 2012[/spoiler]
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2 RespuestasWhat's the difference between people and bullets? [spoiler]people miss Harambe [/spoiler] [spoiler]ill leave[/spoiler]
