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OffTopic

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Edited by Speaker: 3/11/2019 4:35:57 PM
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1st Bank of Offtopic Earnings Report

Due to burgeoning interest, and an increase in Offtopic spending, our investments have never been stronger. Our members were promised an average of 6% growth in the first year, and we are already outpacing our previous estimates... All revolving accounts have been credited 7% interest on their Capital investment, The primary source of this income is the profit shares of our numerous and varied investments and portfolios, as well as a small share in the Banks Vault storage and containment department which has seen a great amount interest and has numerous commited members. We expect this service to continue to grow as our clients needs expand. As Members of the First Bank, your investment nets you a piece of the success, and we are proud to reward our members and clients to the best of our ability! We are proud to announce this outrageously successful launch of our program, and we thank our neighbors and friends for their continued Patronage We have recently begun construction of our newest Vault Storage facility which will feature new and far more advanced defenses and security protocols, including but not limited to the implementation of [REDACTED] security systems that function actively and have been proven successful in repelling even a [REDACTED] attack. More information will be available to our private customers who elect to engage our services. 1st Bank, Security. Investment. Success
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