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Edited by Lethenza: 11/12/2016 1:50:45 PM
20

The Quest to take a dump

To take everyone's mind off the political craziness, I'd like to share something I found a bit funny that happened to me at school yesterday (I'm 8 and a half but very mature for my age) (that was sarcasm, don't hurt me ninjas). I was sitting in my Marine Biology class, and I had to take a crap. Bad. I was farting and everyone around me was blaming each other. At the back of the classroom, there's a door that opens up a short hallway that connects to the adjacent classroom. In this short hallway, there is a single person stall. I got up and went to this hallway, midway through the teacher's lecture cause' I couldn't wait any longer. I tried the door, and it was locked. Occupied. Welp, I could hold it a little longer, so I did. Literally ten minutes later, this dude still wasn't coming out of the bathroom. I tried the door a couple more times to let the dude know to hurry the -blam!- up. Then I heard papers shuffling from inside. Some sneaky asshat was doing his homework or something. "Screw this", I think. I'll find another bathroom, because this is taking too damn long and my teacher is probably getting suspicious. I pass through the next classroom over, and the world religion teacher seemed to be dozing off in his off period. I passed through after saying hi and limped to next bathroom, nearly shitting myself at this point. The next bathroom was a proper public restroom with three stalls. Two stalls were taken. The third was missing the door, so that wouldn't fly. I couldn't wait at this point. I limped up the stairs to the next nearest bathroom, my eyes bloodshot and tears streaming down my face. This bathroom was luckily completely empty, so I took the dump of a lifetime. I sprinted back to the world religion classroom, and tried the door (to get back in the same way I came and avert suspicion), but the teacher was asleep and the door was locked. I used the main entrance to get back into the Marine Biology classroom, and while the teacher wasn't really acknowledging me, the students were all shooting me funny looks. That's my story, it's pretty shitty (no pun intended), but it's better than politics.

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