To all those who have signed up for Exalin, go here: https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/110311074

You're on the moon where are you evacing to? Well protect you

War has just been declared between the empire and the sovereignty. It's a dark day

The empire and the sovereignty are in a standoff. If you guys would break the tension, it would be much appreciated.

The Taco Shop is declaring independence from the leader of the Moon Colony. We will still be here. However, we will have our own separate government. Can this request be accepted?

The excursion to Exalin begins tomorrow. To all who have signed up, be ready.

I've regained my sanity *sadistic laughter echoes through the colony* Not really. I can't wait to take more tormented souls straight to Hell that's the main reason I'm here but if I'm asked to I'll help out if it's worth my time

I've lost all hope to call to the moon now

Were still evacing?

Get me all the leaders, I am the general of magikarp army's and we all need to have a meeting about the rebuilding of the dojo and empire, the magikarp base is fine thankfully so we are offering any help we are able to but we need to have a meeting

Ok so there's a story about a man named eddie and it goes like this: Eddie was your average joe just wanted to stay home and play videogames. Now eddie didn't really want to go MLG but what he did want is his abusive mother to one day posts is KD on the fridge. He thought. "Hmmm maybe if I could get better internet I might be able to get some kills in a game and get My KD on the fridge. So Eddie went to work on scrubbing off the Dorito dust of other people's controllers. Eddie didn't like his job that much but hey, if this would get him that KD it was worth it. He worked for a month straight and finally earned enough money to buy his internet not from Taco Bell but from the SHADY GUY BEHIND THE DUMPSTER! Pause: now you may be wondering how is getting it from a shady guy Breter than Taco Bell. Here's why. The Taco Bell near Eddie had burritos covering the router and blocking the magical signal of the 🌈internet🌈 reaching his Xbox. Resume: Eddie was so happy with his new internet and he only lagged out of every other game instead of just every game. So Eddie went on his rampage of gaming for 48 hours straight on call of duty bo2. He fresh started so he could try and set a new record of a 0.30 KD instead of 0.10. It was going to be a tough one but he was determined. Eddie was doing great his games consisted mostly of 3 kills and 9 deaths! At this rate Eddie would be able to reach the fridge in no time. Then it happened... Eddie just got a barrel stuff no scope!!!! He held at the top of his Lungs "MOM GET THE VIDEO CAMREA" his mom threw down the knitting needles and grabbed the 1080P camrea. EDDIE DID IT! He finally reached a KD of 0.31! He was so happy when he saw his mother printing it out and taccing it to the fridge. He would never forget this moment. Based on a true story Where is Eddie now? Eddie is currently a super senior in Highshcool age:35 and currently very happy with his employment of repairing Mountain Dew damaged Controllers. Story2 Club Once there was a guy named ledison. Ledison only wanted one thing in life. He wanted a badazille filled pole at the club. The only way he could get those badazilles is if he made 500 dollars from one show. He would usually average about 150 dollars each show. Now ledison had a fellow club member with the name of fiddle. Fiddle was always the highlight of the clubs night and the crowd always looked forward to her on and off the stage. Led had hope that Led had hope that maybe the next show he would do he would be able to get those 500 dollars. Fiddle would always try and encourage ledison by giving advice on how to add more sass into the performance. Fiddles help was just enough to help led get through his shows because there was other competition in the club. Mrs loafy would always insult led and put him down saying that he needs to stop talking and start working. Loafy usually insulted led in poetry or story's that she would make up and it really bummed ledison out. But led was determined that with some strong advice from fiddle the famous and some hard work he could get the badazilles on his pole. It was the night of the show led was sweating his straps were soaked. Mrs loafy strutted up to led and showed him a spelling error on a piece of paper. It spelled out ur a misteak. Led thought she said he was a steak but it was actually an insult. The show went on and loafy had just shown the crowd what they were looking for. She went backstage and gave led a nasty look and said "beat that". Ledison was now more determined then ever to beat out loafy win 500 and get those badazilles on his pole. He walked out with sass slapping his straps to his chest in a seductive manner. Lad then continued to correse the pole dabbling his hands on the cold metal and making sure people know who they are making it rain on. Leds over all performance went spectacular. He managed to get 450 on the show with some after the show favors he collected 500 dollars!!! That was his moment! Fiddle was the closing event and led was ready to see what would happen. She walked out on stage in her heels. But as soon as she reached for her badazille filled golden pole she slipped and broke her foot. Some paramedics in the crowd rushed to the scene and carried her away. She was in the hospital and all led could think about is if he should spend money on the badazille or pay for his role model fiddles foot injury. He decided that he would go to the hospital the next day and pay for fiddles broken foot. With fiddle tripping and tired on alchohol filled NyQuil she looked at led and said. " take my pole in place of me, make the crowd happy." Led looked at fiddle and said " mhm" with a reassurance in his eyes. Later that night he struts down the stage to fiddles pole and did one of the hardest tricks in the book. Ledison sucsefully executed the hanging flag with a milk shake taco. The crowd was roaring and throwing there money all over the stage. Led set the world record for most cash in one performance that night and bought the club with the 1 million dollars he made. As soon as he did that he fired loafy to have her work the corners. Led went to check on fiddle in the hospital and she had recovered fully. He bought mor badazilled golden poles and the crowd continued to throw money at fiddle and ledison. THE END

I'm buying all available weapons to defend the taco shop.

I'm am an ambassador from the city and we have decided to give 10,000,000,000 credits for the moon base operation after a long complicated debate. We also sent some blue prints for advanced weapons systems and some materials for a wall. We hope you enjoy these rewards and return a report with good news. We are also setting up another base north of yours called Unity. Thank you for your service and research for mankind

I slowly begin to take off your shirt. Do you wish to continue?

I'm here for a job.

[b]I NEED A TEST SUBJECT FOR A NEW WEAPON IM DESIGNING[/b]

General of the magikarp army here, I think we need to hold a meeting once ninja is back and decide what our next action is