原先發佈於:Sapphire
Here's [url=http://www.facebook.com/itsjaythenerdkid/posts/343461005755782]another thing I wrote on Facebook[/url] that I thought this community might want to read. In this case, I think it's definitely relevant to a lot of people here. Enjoy:
[quote]Hey, gentlemen, pull up a seat and sit down. I'm going to tell you how feminism can very directly help you.
Suicide rates are highest amongst young men. Why? Because society has conditioned us to believe that men are too strong, too independent to need help, so when young men with mental illnesses or men who are struggling in life find themselves backed into a corner, they feel like they have nowhere else to turn. They can't go to a doctor, because that's weak. They can't talk about it to their friends and family, because that's weak too. They're forced by the patriarchy into maintaining a false facade of strength and stoicism, and it ends up costing them their lives. Feminism wants to change that.
Men who go into traditionally "female" professions like nursing are constantly mocked, ridiculed or assumed to be gay. Why? Because why would a man willingly go into a subservient field, one that's only good enough for women? Why would a man lower himself to a woman's level? There are men who find a genuine calling in fields like nursing, and they face societal stigmas and mockery for their whole careers because of it. The patriarchy tells them that they're too good for "female" professions, and it ends up opening them up to the judgement of their peers when they decide to do what they're passionate about anyway. Feminism wants to change that, too.
Men who aren't macho, alpha-male types are portrayed as somehow less deserving of romantic companionship. Why? Because not being macho, not being "alpha" (whatever the hell that even means) are seen as female traits, and any guy who acts like a girl is obviously not a real guy. Guys who want to express themselves emotionally and creatively, guys who want to live lives that don't conform to the patriarchy's expectations, guys who aren't interested in being "real men" and just want to be true to themselves are constantly treated like they're inferior to the muscle-bound, super-successful alpha upper-crust, just because they don't fit society's idea of what a man is meant to look like. Feminism is about fighting that unfair expectation, every minute of every day.
Men are often at an unfair disadvantage in custody battles. Why? Because society doesn't think it's a man's place to be a nurturing, caring parent - his sole responsibility is to provide financially for his family, whilst women do the less glamorous work of caring for the kids. But plenty of guys are fantastic, caring fathers, and they're told that this isn't important because that's female stuff, and female stuff isn't important. Men lose their kids to women who might be unfit mothers because even our justice system thinks all men are emotionless and uninterested in child-rearing, and all women are by default soft and nurturing. Sometimes, this just isn't the case. Feminism is about making society realise that not only is being a good parent not just a female thing, but that the things we think of as "female" aren't inferior, so it's fine if men do those things too!
Male-on-male and female-on-male sexual assault and domestic violence are virtually ignored, and often, male victims of violent crime are not only not given the support they need, but actively mocked for being victims. Why? Because while our cultural narratives support the idea that men are more powerful than women and therefore can do to them whatever they like, they see male victims as weak and somehow deserving of violence if it happens to them, because as men, they should have been able to defend themselves. There are people who think violent crime perpetrated against men is somehow comedy fodder. That's not okay on any level. Feminism wants to change that.
Women can dress pretty androgynously and get away with it; men can't. Why? Because while everyone can understand why women want to be more like men, nobody can understand why men might want to be more like women. This leads to us unfairly questioning the masculinity of gay men, trans men and basically all men who aren't what the patriarchy thinks men should be. Feminism realises that that's an unfair standard, and wants that standard to change.
If you're a man - any man - feminism is about you too. It's about all of us. It's about making the world a better and safer and fairer place. Don't be so quick to dismiss feminism because you think it can't possibly be about you. It can be, and it is.[/quote]
-
[quote]Male-on-male and female-on-male sexual assault and domestic violence are virtually ignored, and often, male victims of violent crime are not only not given the support they need, but actively mocked for being victims. Why? Because while our cultural narratives support the idea that men are more powerful than women and therefore can do to them whatever they like, they see male victims as weak and somehow deserving of violence if it happens to them, because as men, they should have been able to defend themselves. There are people who think violent crime perpetrated against men is somehow comedy fodder. That's not okay on any level. Feminism wants to change that.[/quote] How long have feminists been out to get rid of double standards towards men?
-
How can a pro-life person even do anything about feminism? All feminist organizations are pro-choice, so I cannot support them for that reason.
-
由ABotelho編輯: 3/9/2013 7:21:16 PMPerfect example of how misunderstood feminism is. People assume it's one-sided. I just wish so many people would stop labeling themselves feminists when they aren't. It puts feminism in a bad light for people who don't want to be bothered of separating actual feminism from the idiots who falsely call themselves feminists.
-
Undoing thousands of years of patriarchal society being both socially and biologically hardwired into our brain is going to take time. Thankfully, it should be much less time than it took to develop.
-
I feel like I really need to be more active on these kind of things I mean I believe in equality and I'll treat others the right way but I don't really do anything else, I don't donate to any causes or try to share around articles about gender issues, lgbt issues, etc, Iono
-
由King Dutchy編輯: 3/11/2013 1:56:06 AMI like it when I actually agree with you. Keep doing it. And your name is weird, so I like you even more now.
-
I read "Hey, gentlemen, pull up a seat and sit down. I'm going to tell you how feminism can very directly help you." And stopped there. Personally, if equality in and of itself is not "worth it" then you are trying to /sell/ feminism to men, to me, and I despise that. I'm sure your post has many valid points backed with personal experience and thoughtful examples, but I despise anything but equalism. I'm not trolling at all.
-
-
由Shaka Sangoma編輯: 3/9/2013 2:29:58 AM
-
If feminism is about all of us, then we should name it something else. Maybe... Equalism? I'm being serious.
-
Fantastic post, Jay, I always love reading what you write of Facebook. Funny, because recently I had been thinking about how anti-feminists complain about how there is, in fact, sexism against men, not realizing it's actually only caused by sexism against women.
-
I originally took up nursing and was mocked for it. I didn't change my major because I was being mocked though. I changed it to animal science because I enjoy working with animals, and I can barely stand people, especially loud ones. I don't mind doing things that would get me mocked. I know how to cook, do laundry and all the other things people today (surprisingly) think are for women only and if a man does it, they're gay or something is wrong with them mentally. Besides, I get more things done alone than a man that doesn't know how to cook their own food or do their own laundry.
-
由Ninjabird00編輯: 3/9/2013 7:20:59 AM
-
-
由Steel Assassin編輯: 3/9/2013 8:14:14 AMI never felt that I had to be that manly, or that society was pressuring me (though I will grant you I'd feel odd in a dress. Meh.) The custody battle thing though, definitely true. My dad is 100x the parent than my mom, but he only gained custody over us once the court thought we were old enough to decide for ourselves; every one of us chose our dad over our mom. Despite the fact she didn't have a job, was a heavy chain-smoker, couldn't support her family and never tried, and had a restraining order against her, the court decided she'd be a better parent than my dad, who never been to jail, was mentally stable, had a full-time job, and you know...actually cared for his children. And that's only scratching the surface of things. Let's just say that my childhood would have been a lot better had the court been unbiased and allowed my dad custody right from the start.
-
由welderman adam編輯: 3/9/2013 7:27:04 AMGreat read. I felt the rage swelling with the custody bit.... I'm a paycheck. Not only that, I'm a paycheck based on Overtime! God forbid work ever slows down! And don't get me wrong. I have no issue with paying my share, it's how I got treated by the courts, and other governing entities that gets the ol' nerves twitching.
-
Great post. What I don't understand is why so many people in this thread simply don't care about the topic because it doesn't effect them. Equality between genders should be good enough of a reason.
-
2 回覆
-
I still don't see how it affects me. You talk about men with children. I don't have a child. You talk about men that want to dress like girls. I don't want to dress like a girl and if I did I wouldn't do it in public. You talk about gay crimes. I am not gay. You talk about female oriented jobs. I am in engineering that doesn't concern me. You talk about men not being able to turn to others for help. Everyone has a family and psychologists don't care about your gender as long as you can pay them. Even then I am not so weak to need such things since I have already been through many things in life. In the end those struggles help you grow up and realize what the world is like and how in the end very few people will truly be there for you. How that is affected by feminism is beyond my understanding. So you say feminism affects me when the truth is it doesn't. Now you can argue it affects men in some ways, but in the end I don't see how that matters. The world is cruel so get used to it and don't act like a child thinking everyone will be there for you when the truth is they won't.