How do you share with people something your proud of without coming across as boasting? Any tips you socialites might have for a simple introvert?
-
2 RepliesEdited by kellygreen45: 12/14/2020 4:21:55 PM[quote]How do you share with people something your proud of without coming across as boasting?[/quote] You can't. Because you're trying to control how other people will SEE your actions. You can be sensitive to that tendency to be jealous in other people, buy you can't control it. You can only control your own actions and your own intentions. [quote] Any tips you socialites might have for a simple introvert [/quote] Self-awareness. 1. Why are you proud?. 2. Who are you telling and why? Are you telling others because you're pleased with the accomplishment itself....or because you think it makes you a "better" person and gives you heightened status relative to other people. IOW, are you happy with what you've done, or are you happy about what you believe it proves/says about you? Are you telling people whom you can trust, and who genuinely have your best interests at heart and want to root for your success? Or are you telling random people who have no investment in you....or may actually be your competitors/rivals. IOW, are you sharing with people you care about and who care about you? Or are you putting on show for those who don't really care about you, your success....or may have an interesting rooting against it. TLDR: Be clear about your motives. Know your audience. If you're going to declare something like this that is important to you. Find a safe space, and safe people. Random people are not likely to care about you or want to nurture you and your success. Your COMPETITORS and rivals most certainly aren't going to care...and are the most likely to respond with jealousy or hostility. The really nasty ones may even try to find a way to use it against you. If you're motives are pure, and you've chosen your audience wisely, Your accomplishments will likely be cheered. But if your motives are suspect, and/or you don't choose a "safe space".....you'll recieve a pretty cold welcome at best. Or a downright hostile one. Never diminsh who you are to please others who don't actually care about you to begin with. But learn the difference between HIDING who you are and what you can do.....and simply not washing people's faces in it. They are not the same. Though more toxic and insecure people will try to convince you that they are the same.
-
[i] [/i]
-
Either drop it into a conversation without drawing attention to it, in the hope that the other people notice and start talking about it, or do it in a self-deprecating, sarcastic way. “I won the local tennis tournament yesterday. Wife’s still dead but at least I have something else cold and unfeeling to cuddle in bed now.” Something like that lol.
-
Be more “pumped that i pulled that off” than “oh yeah in cool i just did that”
-
*watches with even more intent studying intent*
-
The line between confidence and arrogance is very thin, Careful not to boast
-
And then there's the avoidance of false modesty/humility...
-
1 ReplyDo it in a funny self deprecating way.
-
Don’t force it into your conversations, but should the topic come up naturally then be sure to expound upon it. That way people know you’re the man for the job, but you didn’t force them to know that. If they makes sense...understanding how each person views and understands you, as well as knowing their individual communicative norms, is also critical. Some people may view you merely saying, “I’m pretty good at XYZ.” as bragging, whereas others will take that to mean you’re barely average. [spoiler]Sorry, all out of salt.[/spoiler]
-
What context though? If you need confirmation then are you really proud at all? If you need to get the conversation going you'll see the chance when similiar things are being discussed. But really speaking I don't know. What am I proud in? [spoiler]Ohno the existential dread is coming again[/spoiler]
-
Take it from a simple introvert such as yourself but with a big ass ego. Don't push your abilities always, you can have confidence, but don't let it morph into arrogance. Save the thrashing people for when it truly matters, such as if you needed to beat out someone for a job.
-
How...did you...