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Edited by DogChamp: 9/18/2016 3:15:13 AM
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My family is mad at me now because of my beliefs

I have always been unsure of god in my life, and I don't know if God exists. All I want is some time alone to figure things out for myself without a biased view on religion, but all I get is my mom telling me to go to church and seek help from a pastor and stuff. She was in tears about me being unsure if god exists, and she teles at me because apparently I know nothing. Apparently I'm foolish to leave god because I'll just go back to him. Apparently she promised to lead me towards god when I was baptized, and now all she is doing by forcing me to go to church is making me less want to be religious. Now she doesn't like one of my best friends. Now my older brother said I'll go to hell to rot away. Now I feel like I am not truly loved by my family if I am not accepts for my beliefs. My dad doesn't want to hear any of this, so I have no clue where he stands, but he has always been odd about religion to me. I just want help, I just want a family that is accepting, but the person in my family I thought would not force me to believe in god, my mom who I love and is usually nice and respectful to everyone no matter their religion, will not let me make my own decision willingly. I don't feel loved right now, I fell hated, and it's not fair. Edit: I think me and my mom have a better understanding of eachother now after talking. I know she is worried about me because she loves me, but I just hope our different views on god don't distance me from my family. I suppose this thread was too click bait, so I changed the title. I probably let my emotions dictate this post more than I should have. Anyways, I now have to probably go to church and deal with the stereotypical Christian parent finding out their child does not think god is as real as the parent thing. It's annoying, but if it's what will keep my mom from crying and feeling terrible about herself and me, then it's what I probably have to do. edit 2: Thanks for the advice and support you guys have been showing. I appreciate it. This was at first a hard thing for me to admit that I doubt god's existence because I was indoctrinated into a family of Christians, and was pretty much taught that atheists were wrong, and that I should never doubt god's existence. I can't say I know the answer the the existence of a god, but I can say that these past 2 days have been a difficult mentally and emotionally. Sunday/ tomorrow will probably be worse because I have to go to church apparently, and I probably have no choice, but I know my mom does mean well in a messed up Christian way. However, I will make my own path and I won't be someone to simply connect unrelated events to prove the existence of a god. Edit 3: I got a bs warning in this topic so I can't reply to it anymore, so yah, wtf. Anyways things are calming down and getting better and I really appreciate the support and advice you guys have been giving, even if there is a troll being disrespectful in this thread, just ignore him/her.

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  • Here's what I've learned. Religion isn't just a fact for many people, it's deeply rooted in their emotions, their life experiences. For these cases, if you come out saying that you are questioning the validity of their religion, it not only hurts them on an intellectual level, but also an emotional level. With that being said, have confidence in yourself, whatever you believe in, and keep an open mind. If your parents want to take you to church everyday, and you're not ok with that, talk to them, and calmly express your feelings. With parents like yours, I would suggest you make it seem as though you're mind is still open to the possibility of their beliefs, but also assert your own. In the end, you'll likely have to compromise, but that's because they're your parents, and they want the best for you spiritually and physically. [spoiler] signed, An Agnostic[/spoiler]

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  • You dont worship Talos? Heretic elves....

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  • I'm currently in similar predicament, but I'm more of "stand your ground" kinda guy where if you mock me or tell me I'm going to hell, I just laugh at your stupidity, of course my mother is on my side but she wishes that I give religion a try but I can't get into what I don't believe in.

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    • Imo religious parents come on too strong when trying to raise their children as christian.

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    • I'm raised Methodist, but I've always questioned the existence of God. I've always found church as a way to become a better person and get better morals. It's just hard for me to believe something like that. The one thing that pisses me off is when they tell you that you're gonna rot in hell for not believing. That makes no sense. You don't believe in heaven or hell, so why the hell would you care? It's like someone from a school going to a different school, then trying to apply the rules from their original school to the new one. It doesn't apply cuz it's a different thing. Lol

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    • YOU GOT A FRIEND IN ME

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      1 Reply
      • Edited by FlimsyRoastBeef: 9/13/2016 9:09:31 PM
        Ban Cozmo I dunno, just follow what you think is right.

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      • You'll figure things out on your own eventually. Ignore their insults, it's a weak attempt to guilt you into following their ideologies. Radical religion of any kind goes against the very messages being taught in the first place, put it this way, if there is a God he will accept you no matter what so long as you try your best to be a kind person and if there isn't then you still lived your life in a way that made the world a better place, no reason to over think things.

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      • If they're shoving it down your throat and telling you that you're going to burn in hell for doubting then they've entirely misunderstood the point of Christianity and need to read their bibles some more. Doubting is not a sin. Doubting is natural.

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      • Good ol Christianity, or religion in general for that matter. You be you, draw your own conclusions, stand up for that when you come to them. If your own family can't accept that then ironically enough they can go to hell.

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      • When someone doesn't approve of my beliefs, I just make it more obvious. If somebody doesn't like me for who I am, I want them to be consistently faced with it until they wise up and mind their own damn business. I won't change for anyone for any reason, and neither should you.

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        • At least you didn't tell mom you were going full blown caitlyn jenner on her)

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        • Edited by pValue2010: 9/12/2016 4:05:32 PM
          That sucks, and sadly it sounds like your best option is to just shut up and do the bare minimum (eg go to church) to appease your mum. Some of those religious folk won't listen to any doubts, and although your mum means well and is acting that way because she cares, she won't bother to listen to reason. So there's no point in disrupting your relationship. When you're 18 you don't have to deal with it. Edit: you may even want to consider taking your mom up on talking to the pastor. A lot of religious leaders I've met are actually open minded and don't believe in force (although I don't know what your specific sect is like). This could do wonders in convincing your mum to leave you alone.. Just make sure you try to leave out your emotions and stay mature if you do keep talking about it

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          • Edited by Hwood98: 9/11/2016 9:58:58 PM
            The "what if" is best here. What if god does exist? Will you go to heaven and your soul live a great eternal paradise, or go to hell and live in a river of fire for eternity. What if religion is fake and nothing happens? Well you have nothing to worry about. Not saying to choose either or which religion to believe. Just do what you think it is right. But would it hurt you physically to appease your loved ones to attend church and put some actual belief in it? Best wishes.

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            • Kind of the same situation my atheist friend who found out through a mutual friend, found out I was a Christian and told me "I don't like you anymore I can't be friends with a blind sheep" I truly believed he was my friend this really hurt.

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              • Anyone who is religious who is over the age of ten has something seriously wrong with their head. It defies logic and the only thing that tells you God is there is other people saying it but then they tell you not to listen to other people saying the same thing with a different God. The fact that your mom cried about it is pathetic and she is delusional. I can understand why you might be confused being raised like that but try to be smarter and not give a f about made up garbage.

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              • Tell your family that you are a friendly, peaceful Jain.

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              • No no no you go back to your Jesus now

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              • Tell them you do beleive in a god, then start shouting khornate battle crys. Problem solved.....I think.

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                • Edited by Treebeard: 9/10/2016 8:21:12 PM
                  Don't worry. When they inevitably die and realise there is only eternal oblivion, you'll have the last laugh. Except you won't be laughing, because your family members are dead.

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                  • Dude I'm very conflicted about my religion it's hard to tell what the future will hold so all I do is wait and see I go to church every Sunday but I still wonder sometimes if there's a God or not it's a very weird topic and stuff doesn't add up when you put science and the bible together both seem to have faults so :/ [spoiler]#nopunctation [/spoiler]

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                    • I'm proud of you for questioning the belief system you grew up in. It shows you have the will to think for your own. I had a similar upbringing to you, but my parents didn't really give a shit about whether I stayed with the belief or not. But luckily, you don't have reccurring mental illness because of the indoctrination like I do, so that's good. Anyways, I wish you luck in discovering yourself. One day, your family will accept that you believe in what you believe in. Continue to live the way you want to. Your family, no matter how much they love you or don't love you, should never be able to live or decide your life for you. At the same time, keep trying to understand how they feel. Right now, a tolerance of each other is what your family should strive for. It might take a while, but one day it will get there.

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                      • believe in what you want to believe. questioning if there is a higher power or not is completely fine because no-one knows (Yay agnostic). those that bash you and say "you will go to hell" and "God exists", they are ignorant asshats. that is their belief and that's it. maybe they are right, maybe they are wrong, same for those that say there is no god. tldr: believe what you want, no-one knows the real answer. and don't let factors such as friends and family push you into a decision.

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                        • Edited by E Runna: 9/11/2016 1:52:21 AM
                          Congratulate yourself for having the intellectual capability to break out of the religious bubble :D

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                          • nothing against you OP (As a catholic I hope you figure out what you are looking for) but why do so many people post similar stuff on the internet? If it was me i would be talking to my friends not people on the internet, but that's just me

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                            • It's impossible to force someone or yourself to believe in something. I was in largely the same boat as you for a while, but you can't let this get you down. Give it time.

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