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Edited by IntrepidTurtle: 9/8/2015 2:15:09 PM
18

Dueling Banjos

Whenever someone mentions that banjo scene from Deliverance, I think about actually fighting with banjos. And I mean, why don't we? That would just be -blam!-ing kickass. Scene: WWII battleground. A platoon of Nazi soldiers are running towards a small squadron of U.S. soldiers who are low on ammunition and aware of the imminent danger. A man comes out of a small bunker with a black case on his back. He opens it up to pull out his weapon: THE BANJO! He charges towards the enemy advancing on his comrades' position, and in a single swing of the broad end of his banjo, 3 Nazi soldiers are left decapitated. As soon as the other soldiers notice the fall of there own men, they are swiftly met with the unforgiving barrel of the .44 neck of the banjo. 8 rounds fire out of the banjo with a loud enough noise to be equated to the deafening sound of a hand grenade going off only feet away from you. Each round from the banjo hits its target and in an effort to eliminate the rest of this opposing force, the banjo wielding U.S. soldier begins to pick the strings of his instrument with the speed of a cheetah and the accuracy of a champion archer. As the soldier continues his song his banjo begins to glow red as he plays faster and faster, and in the blink of an eye, the remaining Nazi soldiers are reduced to nothing but ash and helmets atop the piles. Badass, amirite?
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