A few days ago, this stupid ugly idiot with a pyramid backpack and some six-eyed freak tried to mug me. And I want to be very clear about something. These pieces of garbage have no idea who they're dealing with! (I'm starving. You don't have nothing to eat in this show, Dad.)
Right, so these punks... Yes. ...I don't know if they wanted glimmer or they wanted something more ascendant. But it's a lucky thing I had my pieces. My guns. Anyway, I started blasting. Voop! Voop! Now, I don't see so good with all the pervading darkness, so I missed, but my five friends came to help and then the freaks ran away. We ran after them.
Bang! Tried to shoot one of them in the back, but I don't run or jump so good either (warlock main). Anyway, you guys all think I'm a hero, and I'll accept that responsibility.
Look, crime in this throne world is out of control. Thank the Traveler I went down to Xur and picked up an Outbreak and a Gjallarhorn. I don't think one would've done it. I'm gonna go out and buy some more. And I think you should, too. Don't be a victim. It's time to fight back. And get some sweet loot.
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