I beg to differ. While I haven't taken the opportunity to read this yet, I feel the important issue is whether YOU like your writing or not. If you enjoy it, then it's of no consequence what others think (unless you're striving to make a career of it, of course). Hobbies should be for your pleasure, even if it's something as simple as whittling. Keep at it; I have to assume you like to if you've put so much effort into it.
Going to read this later, but from what I’ve seen by just scrolling, it looks good so far
[spoiler]Accidentally put the original comment as part of the post[/spoiler]