Give me a reason why I shouldn't commit suicide. Many people call us ungrateful, and you're right. We are ungrateful for the lives we've been given, and that's because each day in these bodies, these lives, is torture. We can't help it we were born this way. By "us", I mean people like me. People who just want to end their suffering. [b]Long Backstory[/b] I was an uncharted birth. My mom was a one night stand to a man named Matt, and that's all I know about him except he had blond hair, like me. So, the condom broke, and my mom got pregnant. She tells me otherwise, but I think she wanted an abortion, as she was only 19, and living with her parents. Anyway, I was born, and was a smart kid. I learned to read fluently before pre school, could do basic math, and some Spanish. When I went into pre school, I was bullied, and one day I came home, and I had seen kids at pre school [i]ràping[/i] each other, although I didn't know what it was yet. The school later closed down, but by then I was in kindergarten. The next few grades are a blur. All I remember is I had no friends, and my mom started drinking and smoking A LOT. So, fast forward to 5th grade. I had finally made a few friends, let's call them Martin, Cade, Ally, and Samuel. I joined their "group" one day, and the cloud hovering over me vanished. I was finally [i]happy[/i]. I got into sports, volunteered, and had a better relationships with my mom. Then, a new boyfriend, let's call him Lincoln came. He was a nice guy, a lawyer, so he made a lot of money. But him and my mom got in fights a lot, and sometimes he'd beat her. He got way too close to me sometimes, and although we had a bond, it made me really uncomfortable. But, aside from him, other things were happening. My "friends" started hate no each other. I couldn't be friends with all of them. It tore me apart. Eventually, when I picked a "side" which wasn't with Ally, my only female friend, she started telling everyone secrets about me, some lies and some true. Soon enough, everyone hated me. My friends, my teachers (my grades had started dropping, I was a straight a student, but not now. They couldn't figure out why...) my mom.... I felt like everyone was against me. My life was filled with what if's. Right about now would be the part where the love of my life entered and saved me, but the truth is, he left me with all my other best friends. All that could console me were video games and comics, both of which my mom took away. [b]one year later[/b] I was in 6th grade, and it was my birthday. My mom got me a "dream journal". I logged in it every night, and every night it was filled with gory and terrifying nightmares. It helped though. I began to think I'd get better, but I couldn't. I just kept thinking about what had happened, and it was like a never ending cycle. I've gone through 3 dream journals, and I'm in middle school now. Nothing has changed. I'm sick of living this way. I just want to end it. So, I guess what I'm saying is [i]give me a reason [/i] Edit- thank you. That's all I can say. I only made this a few minutes ago, and I already feel so much better. I mostly just made this as an outlet for my misery, not expecting anyone to reply, but I actually feel like you care. Thank you