This duel is over! You're out of lifepoints!

http://www.ultraimg.com/images/t86Ef.gif

http://www.twitch.tv/bobross

http://marketing.spirit.com/traveldeals/air.php?s=2348&e=1&utm_source=experian&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=102815_73rdtrip&utm_content=basicwitch_button_c&tp=i-H43-5c-3Zw-3QzYP5-1c-5nYYV-1c-3QxDlF-1zaErE

http://goo.gl/forms/GUeNTvmwTy TAKE THIS SURVEY

Negative ghostrider

http://ifunny.co/fun/tG2LjcLM3

Byophawns are libidinous succubus-esque creatures, usually touching them ends in intercourse!

http://i.imgur.com/.jpg

How to get 63 strange coins quick I swear I was correcting someone

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http://m.9gag.com/gag/aPGzNPB

YOU GOT TO BE MOTHERFLUCKING KIDDING ME (My friends kept making fun of this girl that I was helping babysit her younger sister)

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Evil Every Villain Is Lemons

https://youtu.be/w67_USCGLlM

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[quote]When you get anything at McDonald's because you are fat[/quote]

https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/162207152/0/0

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>The year is 2048 >Trump's Empire has taken Europe and is now invading North Korea >Trump the Ever-Living is working on plans for his Mars base >One of Trump's advisers entered the war room >"My Lord, we just received news that your strike team has failed. Kim Jong Un is still alive." >Trump stood up from his solid gold throne >"Looks like I have to do this myself." >"Sir?" >The Trumptator adjusted his tie >"I need a weapon." >Trump's holocopter (a helicopter with a cloaking device) positions itself above Kim Jong Un's palace >"This shouldn't be long." >He jumps from the holocopter without a parachute >Trump lands standing up, his solid gold armor preventing any bodily harm >The palace's doors open on their own upon Trump's arrival >Lord Trump moves quickly through the palace >The guards put up little resistance, the Trumptator taking them out with headshots >Trump the Immortal enters the throne room and is quickly surrounded by palace guards >They encircle him and take his gold plated assault rifle >"Rooks rike you're stumped!" said the Korean Dictator with a smile >Trump smirks "I don't think so." >Our lord unleashes his dual omni-blades and cuts down the guards in a matter of seconds >Kim Jong Un takes out a handgun from his inside his jacket >"FRUK YOU!" he screams as he empties the magazine >Trump raises his hand and stops all of the bullets Darth Vader style >Lord Trump aims his trademark gold plated revolver at the Korean dictator >"Kim.." >A bead of sweat ran down the side of Kim Jong Un's face >Trump the Undying pulled back the hammer and smirked >"You're fired" PART 2: >The year is 2066 >Wake up, turn on TNN (Trump News Network) >Watch the destruction from the Blitzkrieg of Europe >Think to myself "Thank God I live in Trumptopia" >Look outside my window >Notice the Trumpstapo kick down my neighbors door >They drag out my neighbor, Francisco Pedro Alejandro Gomez >Trumpstapo force him onto his knees >A man in solid gold comes up to my neighbor, closely followed by his guards, the Trumpen-SS >I squint and notice that it's him, it's really him >Trump the Ever-Living >Trump the Undying >Trump the Conqueror >The other neighbors started to gather around >"You're illegal aren't you?" Our Lord asked >"No senor, no no!" >"That's what they all say" >The Trumpstapo got him on his feet "What should we do with him, my Lord?" >The Trumptator smirked >My neighbors begin to chant >"Wall! Wall! Wall! Wall!" >"Send him to the Wall! Take him away!" >My neighbors cheer and celebrate >Several days later >Turn on TNN >On Fridays, TNN live streams the Wall >All the illegals found that week are stood up on top of the Great Trump Wall >Notice my neighbor is among them >A man in solid gold appears on top of the Wall >How he gets there is unknown, he just does it, he's Trump the Ever-living >The camera zooms in on our Lord >"To all illegals that continue to taint Trumptopia, I will find you. And I will stump you." >Lord Trump begins to kick each illegal one by one off the wall >Their screams echo and quickly disappear as they fall to their death >Those that came to Wall to see the action live shout "STUMPED" after each illegal is kicked What a great time to be alive PART 3: >2068 >Emperor Trump is nearing his goal of world conquest >The North American Empire can't be stopped >Mexico has been destroyed and the blitzkrieg of Europe will begin soon, lead of course by the Emperor himself >America has truly become great again >A rebellion has risen in the NAE >Comprised mostly of libcucks and nogs who want their welfare back >Have tried several times to assassinate Trump the Ever-living but all have failed >The rebellion has devised a new plan that they think will succeed >Have an operative that is Trump's personal servant >Will put poison his wine >The Rebellion will meet at noon before they carry out the plan >The operative goes to the secret meeting location >The rebels tell stories about how a man named Bernie almost defeated Trump >They say how everything and everyone would have been free if Bernie had won >One rebel adds on to the story "Trump wouldn't have won if people knew of his immortality" >A man with a scar under his right eye gives the poison to the operative >"Poison him, end our suffering, it's what Bernie would have wanted" >He takes the poison and hides it as he enters the Trump House >The operative gets the wine and adds in the poison >He stops before entering the Oval Throne Room >"For Bernie" he says to himself as he enters the throne room >He is immediately stopped by the guards who take the wine and aim their weapons at him >"What's going on, it's just wine!" the operative proclaims >The Emperor stand up from his solid gold throne >"Do you truly believe this plan would have worked?" >"Your rebel friends have been dealt with, one of my agents told me of your plan" >The man with the scar under his right eye enters the room and stand next to Lord Trump >"No, NO! This cannot be" the operative says in disbelief >Trump the Ever-living takes his gold plated revolver from his desk >"You're fired" PART 4: >2016 >Trump has just been elected >About to say first words as president >He adjusts his tie and looks straight on into the audience >"Obama, you're fired" >Shortly after this Trump reveals that he's immortal and destroys the constitution >Trump is emperor for the rest of time >2025 >Emperor Trump has solved all of the US' problems >Illegals are stuck behind the Great Trump Wall >The Trumpen-SS keeps degenerates off the streets >Nogs are enslaved again >Trumpstapo sends all illegals that try to get past wall to Trumpentration Camps What a great time to be alive PART 5: >2087 >The Trumptopian war machine controls all of Earth's surface >This has become a problem since there is nowhere to deport immigrants >There isn't really such a thing as immigrants now >That's just what Trump the Unstumpable calls anyone who rebels against him >The common solution has been to attach weights to their feet and throw them into an ocean >But our great Lord Trump is stuck now >There is nowhere to expand >No place to conquer >No place, at least, on Earth >Trump, not to be stumped by Earth, turns his eyes to the stars >He invests about 5% of his net worth (100 quadrillion Donald Dollars) into his space program >He amasses a fleet of 2000 Trump Destroyers and hundreds of thousands of Trump Fighters >The Trumpwaffe is disbanded and all Propaganda Bombers are converted to starships >Flash forward to 2104 >Trump the Conquerer is ready to begin his conquest of the Solar System >He puts out a law that all able-bodied men must serve in his glorious conquest or be deported >Immediately all the citizens of Trumptopia rush to our Lord's aid >Those who didn't are immediately stumped >Trump the Mighty addresses his people >"Today, we embark on a new conquest" >"A conquest whose single goal is to stump all of the illegal aliens in the Solar System" >"Today, we are no longer the Empire of Trumptopia" >"We become the Trumptopian Galactic Empire!" >"Hail, Trump!" >"Hail, Trump!" >"Hail, Trump!" >( '-')/

You're walking in the woods. There's no one around, And your phone is dead. Out of the corner of your eye you spot him, Shia Labeouf. He's following you About 30 feet back. He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint. He's gaining on you. Shia Labeouf. You're looking for your car, But you're all turned around. He's almost upon you now And you can see there's blood on his face! My god, there's blood everywhere! Running for your life (From Shia Labeouf.) He's brandishing a knife. (It's Shia Labeouf.) Lurking in the shadows Hollywood superstar Shia Labeouf. Living in the woods, (Shia Labeouf.) Killing for sport, (Shia Labeouf.) Eating all the bodies Actual, cannibal Shia Labeouf. Now it's dark and you seem to have lost him, But you're hopelessly lost yourself. Stranded with a murderer, You creep silently through the underbrush. A-ha! In the distance, A small cottage with a light on. Hope! You move stealthily toward it, But your leg! AH! It's caught in a bear trap! Gnawing off your leg, (Quiet, quiet.) Limping toward the cottage, (Quiet, quiet.) Now you're on the doorstep, Sitting inside, Shia Labeouf. Sharpening an ax, (Shia Labeouf.) But he doesn't hear you enter, (Shia Labeouf.) You're sneaking up behind him. Strangling superstar Shia Labeouf. Fighting for your life with Shia Labeouf, Wrestling a knife from Shia Labeouf, Stab it in his kidney. Safe at last from Shia Labeouf. You limp into the dark woods, Blood oozing from your stump leg. But you have won. You have beaten Shia Labeouf

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