the entire premise of pantheon is what I've been training for. It is, or will be in it's final week, the ultimate test of endurance gaming. Grueling 36 hour sessions, which only occured because I didn't feel like sleeping, have seasoned me. The ramp up in difficulty of seasonal content has conditioned me. [i]I was meant to be a Godslayer.[/i] There is but one single barrier between me and my really dumb and pointless destiny: preexisting mental illness and traumatic lfg experiences. However, if I can just get my brain to shut the -blam!- up, to -blam!- believe in myself like I -blam!- ought to, if I can figure out how to work off the anxious energy and intrusive thoughts without being weird and/or toxic, I'm gonna have PROOF that I'm good at this game. I don't even know why I'm posting this here. this is the very same community that contributed to how hard it is for me to be in a raid period, after all, and forums do bring out the worst in ppl. Maybe it's me trying to double-dog dare me to get it the -blam!- done. Well challenge accepted, you -blam!- (me), because you (still me) are gonna look like a massive idiot who didn't believe I could do it. I AM a hardcore gamer just as deserving of respect and props as every mediocre manchild bully I ever had the displeasure to lfg with, and i'll get that title or kill myself trying, and there's nothing God, the President, or anyone thinking to arrange an intervention can do about it!