You know that cliche in teen movies when the main character is feeling moody so they climb up on the roof to be alone? I used to think that scene was overdramatic and stupid. Now, I see the sense of it. Having a cool place to be alone is actually pretty rad. Behind my house is wilderness. I go walking back there when I’m looking for solitude. It’s very easy to get lost, but I have lots of landmarks that help me along. Like the old grave that definitely shouldn’t be there. Or the wooden pallets where I used to stash my cigarettes. There’s a large clearing filled with bones that I’ve collected, but I’m not allowed to keep inside the house. That rule came about when I brought a spinal column to dinner. Theres a really big tire that a young tree has grown through, and a small forest of plants that look like umbrellas. My favorite has got to be the fallen tree with the bark scraped off. It makes a very nice chair. I’ll sit out there with some smokes, let my dog chew on some old bones, and call somebody worth talking to. It’s very peaceful. Except when a pack of coyotes starts screaming and you have to leave. Sometimes I find weird stuff in the woods. Never weird enough to stop me going back. Recently I’ve found a rock painted completely red sitting on a stump. If I were even slightly dumber I would’ve picked it up, but I plan to live a long and happy life free of tormentuous woodland curses. I also came across a pair of chairs opposite each other in a clearing, which gave me a jolt of deja vu so disturbing I left immediately. It felt like I’d walked in on a something repressed. Somebody carved Croatoan into one of the birch trees. Of all the ominous things to scratch into a tree, and you pick one that’s been done before. Unoriginal. I found a railroad spike which I stuck into a tree knot. That took a lot of effort, not sure what the point was. And I’m not sure what the point of this post is, other than to encourage you to spend some time in the woods. The Magnetic Fields and all other projects of Stephin Merritt make a great wandering soundtrack.