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Beastmaker129により編集済み:
1/23/2021 4:33:56 PM
31
[i]A tall blond man walks in, and sits at a table, a simple black suit on with coattails. [/i]
English
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Ok I didn’t wanna alarm you in there but it’s a lot. Cameras everywhere. Lasers, but not tripwire lasers, just stationary lasers to sever your legs. How do you think I ended up with two peg legs? By the way total dick move making me climb the ladder to the roof when there is literally an alley right there. Do you know how hard it is to climb with wooden stumps?? Anyways there’s also guards. Everywhere. Imagine the Macy’s thanksgiving day parade but with a million guys in stupid grey uniforms with stupid walkie talkies, and instead of parade floats they have golf carts with useless sirens for slightly more important guys in stupid grey uniforms to ride. You’d think it’d be easy to blend in with a stolen guard uniform, but they’ve all had facial reconstruction surgery to look exactly like David Bowie. I think it was an intimidation tactic. That dude does look pretty scary. And I guess it’s good insurance knowing that the only man capable of possibly robbing this place is dead. As added insurance, all the pigeons within a 50 mile radius have had knives taped to their faces. Now, back to the emerald. The saferoom is actually not a room, it’s an entire floor of the building, except we have no idea which one because the floors are capable of shuffling like a deck of cards thanks to a giant robotic crane that probably cost taxpayers a couple billion. Like I said before, the gem is the size of a basketball, as heavy as Cmirgs mom, and shaped like Mrs PacMan. It fits in a backpack but if you try to carry it that way you’ll have to spend all your earnings on spinal reconstruction surgery. It doesn’t roll, it’s narrowly impossible to carry, and it definitely doesn’t fit in your sock. If you break it apart, it looses its value to me, so caution is important. If I see one chip off my prize, I can assure you, the Russians will not be merciful when they not only discover the thief responsible for their missing gem, who has mysteriously returned, but also that it is no longer in your possession. Still confident? Wanna take a look at the peg legs once more? Did I mention the birds?
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Beastmaker129により編集済み: 1/24/2021 12:02:12 AMIf you’ll excuse me for a moment, [i]he turns around, and a few moments later, his appearance is completely different. Now in front of you, is a tall Caucasian man, seemingly in his 40’s. Medium length greying brown hair, a chiseled nose, a strong jaw, and piercing yet disarmingly gentle grey eyes. His clothing shifts to a black suit with a white shirt and black tie, a charcoal fedora and beige overcoat appearing finally.[/i] There we go. Now I look like me. [i]he chuckles.[/i] Yes you did mention the birds, and the peg legs. I’ll do it. [i]He smiles slightly, no teeth. [/i]
