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Unseelie Nilにより編集済み:
10/16/2020 4:53:34 AM
24
This message about Xbox Live Gold
[quote]Your subscription is going to expire soon. We don't want that to happen - we hope you don't either.
Consider renewing your subscription before it runs out.[/quote]
Why does this read like some mob enforcer leaving a veiled threat?
Are they gonna come to my house with a bat and break my legs if I don't pay my Gold protection fees?
"Be a damn shame if you don't renew...*cracks knuckles* ...real damn shame..."
English
#Offtopic
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Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise? I thought not. It's not a story the Jedi would tell you. It's a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life... He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful... the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. It's ironic he could save others from death, but not himself.
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As NIL walks into an Italian restaurant, she sees Bill Gates who motions for her to come over. As she approaches, Bill snaps his fingers and his bodyguard places a chair for her across from his employer. Bill speaks as he cuts his perfectly cooked chicken parm. “Now NIL, I heard you’s forgot to buy the Gold again.” He takes a bite of his meal. “Would you be able to explain why to me why it is yous not gotten our service?” NIL begins to speak, “Well I haven’t forgotten but I-“ Bill interrupts. “Have I ever told yous about the time Toni caught one of our clients with a PlayStation? There was a story about it in the paper. Two broken halves of a brand new PS4 found right outside our clients apartment. Toni was so distraught to hear he had decided to move on from us. Now, I’m not saying yous moving on, but even so, you wouldn’t want to make Toni upset would ya?”
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See, it happened last year. I didn't pay up, cause I was too busy laughing, cause it's America. What would they do? Well, I went on a walk, came home in a coffin. Relatives were pretty spooked when I sat up during the funeral. Heh heh. [spoiler]Lol, joke.[/spoiler]
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It’s like that Monty Python sketch; “That’s a nice army base ya got there govner...be a shame if sumfin was to, [i]happen[/i] to it.” “What are you saying?” “Govner I’m your friend. But accidents happen...sumfin could catch fire. We can help you.” ...or however it goes, it’s been months since I’ve watched it. [spoiler]Sorry, all out of salt.[/spoiler]
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2 通の返信Bill Gates takes his glasses off and polishes them with a monogrammed handkerchief. "Yous'll want to pay up, so Big Sam doesn't have to - lean on you. Know what I mean?"
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1 返信Dear Nil or whom it may concern. We at Microsoft value your continued patronage, and support, we noticed you have not paid the protection fee so generously rated for your Xbox. This is very disappointing, 1 because you have been a loyal patron for so long, and 2 because we care deeply for the health and safety of your xbox; boy would it be a shame if one day it "accidentally" had a tragic fall out a 2 story window. We would truly be heartbroken. Please send your fee in the enclosed envelope, Rocko will be by on Friday to pick it up BG.
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1 返信[quote] Why does this read like some mob enforcer leaving a veiled threat? Are they gonna come to my house with a bat and break my legs if I don't pay my Gold protection fees?[/quote] That’s exactly what will happen. [spoiler] [/spoiler]
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1 返信Either it will auto pay, or it won't pay it or allow you to pay it at all. I had to call xbox and have them cancel it because it expired and wouldn't let me pay it due to it being expired, the redundancy and irony.
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4 通の返信Ona seperate note. Games with gold is trash. We've had like 2 good games this year
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1 返信didn't come off that way to me at all, i think you think some kinda way that makes you think that they think that i think you think people want to hurt you?
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2 通の返信“And while we’re at it, it looks like you’re not subscribed to game pass. We’d happily tell you about the benefits of doing so some other time but I think we would all want to avoid us having to [u]send you a message[/u].” -Microsoft
