I met yet another squeaker today. It was a pretty average day in Destiny. I had just finished eating dinner. I reconnected my controller and looked down at my phone to transfer my weapons in progress for a weekly heroic strike.
Then, I heard the seemingly innocent ding of an invite that will forever more make me cringe.
I thought to myself, "Who is this? Ah, who cares? I haven't done anything yet this week. What could he possibly want to do that I won't want to do?" I pressed firmly that Xbox controller home button, that vessel to a plethora of bad consequences, and off I was. Little did I know of what would take place in the next five minutes.
The screen seemed to load the same way one's eyes would clear from the blur of regaining consciousness, and not a moment after did my mind and stomach alike plunge into the despair of wanting it to be anything but that: consciousness. A dream was my wish, that what I saw on my screen was nothing more than a nightmare with the capability's extent of causing a jolt back into reality. I was severely dismayed.
There before me I saw a name, and next to it, a number. The name did not scare me; it could certainly have had better implications, but nothing I haven't seen before.
The number, that's what scared me.
As my eyes shifted right, the number 25 flashed for a brief moment, and then darkness. My eyes were now closed. I felt a chill on my arms and neck. Could this guy be serious?
I waited for a while, still hopeful he would tell me that he had placeholder gear on, or something, anything. I didn't think to inspect him on account of my baffled and petrified state.
He wasn't talking, and nothing was changing on my screen. I waited with bated breath. Finally, to my horror, I heard the shrillest, most vainly excited voice I had ever heard on this game say, "OKAY WE'RE READY LET'S GOOOOOO"
We touched down on Venus, and he stared in awe of the structure in the shape of a circular door. "WHOOOOAAAAA WHAT IS IT?" My forehead was promptly met with an open palm.
"Did you not read what you picked to do? It's the Vault of Glass raid."
No sooner did I finish the word "Vault" than the squeaker took the initiative to answer his own question:
"MY FRIEND TOLD ME TO DO THE RAID TO GET BETTER SO LET'S DO IT!"
"Just the two of us?"
"YEAH WHY? I COULD GET ANOTHER GUY IF YOU WANT!"
"You need six players to-"
"Guardian down."
"WHAT THE F**K I HIT HIM!"
I could continue to quote the rest of his explanation as to why he died to the Praetorian, but half of what he said was unintelligible nonsense, and the other half was too loud for me to focus on the words.
He ran over to me as I killed the Praetorian and remained standing on the left sync plate.
"SO WE'RE GONNA DO THIS THREE TIMES THEN WE'LL DO CRATO OKAY?!"
He jumped onto the sync plate with me, and I pulled out my ghost. I was through with those ludicrous shenanigans.
TL;DR Please pray for me.
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To see the rest of my stories, click this link: [url]https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/108243048/0/0[/url]
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I would like to say that not all squeakers are like this. I consider myself a squeaker still (puberty has kicked in though) and I am a team player. I prefer to work with the team and and not ask annoying questions unless it is for clarification with new groups (like middle or center strat, relic holder/sword bearer, ect) I do get annoying sometimes, but I try to keep it to a minimum when things get serious. So please, don't always assume a squeaker is bad or annoying, they might just surprise you. [spoiler]Or they might just scream in your ears and ruin your day. One of the two[/spoiler]
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Ok so here's my two cents. If u have kids playing this game then u should be watching them. My 8 year old plays. He loves it. Rules are this He only plays raids with me and my usual group He isn't allowed to join any raids or talk on the head set unless it's with me and my usual group. He never accepts invites from people he don't know. He's a lvl 32 with gloowoo on but he's still a squeaker As much as I want him to enjoy all aspects of the game I am also respectful of other players in that when they invite a 32 that's got 10 hard raid completions the last thing they expect or want is a squeaker. This protects him also from being kicked as at 8 years old kids are easily hurt and affected by this. This is a T rated game. Responsible parents should monitor use. Just my opinion.
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Guardian1025により編集済み: 3/11/2015 3:30:58 AM[quote]"Just the two of us?"[/quote] Am I the only one who immediately imagined hearing the song "[b]Just The Two of Us[/b]" by Bill Withers playing in the background after reading that part?
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It's moments like this where I just blankly stare..sigh..go to my settings, appear offline, pull out my ghost and flee
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I've tried doing Vault solo a few times, doesn't go well. Of course I'm a 30 but I play like a 20.
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Zyryanにより編集済み: 3/6/2015 6:17:36 AM
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You're the best man. You always give me a good chuckle through well told satirical stories.
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I wanted to take "CRATO" down today, so I hopped on LFG in search of a solid raid team. Found a promising post ("Just need 1 more at Crota"), so I messaged the player for an invite. I accepted my invite only to find me and one other player in the fireteam in orbit. Much to my dismay, a Squeaker starts telling me to stay in the fireteam since everyone else will join shortly (they're in the tower, he says). I stayed on LFG just in case, and lo and behold, I see that he updated his post [i]after[/i] I'd already joined him!! Stupidly, I decided to stick around. Long story short, I spent the next half hour listening to Squeaker argue with a ~20 year old Warlock about who should be the sword runner (I'm an experienced Hunter, Warlock was a pothead Warlock). We failed to make it out of the Acolyte room the first two tries, and we never even made it to the second sword. I think I need therapy...
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