[b][i] Alright you -blam!-ers!! Ready to see what you’re reading today? A hard ass Titan insulting the lobster people! Bring a sword! -Drunk Drifter [/i][/b] (DISCLAIMER: THIS IS MEANT TO BE HUMOROUS) Now, today you soft belly -blam!- what kids, you’re learning about the cities worst enemy, both in terms of combat and guilty darkness pleasuring. The Hive. [b]History[/b] Now the hive used to be these three eyed -blam!-ers from another world. Then they made a deal with Worm gods which basically means they had makeshift dildos shoved in them which keep em alive. Eventually Oryx got a gender transplant, Savathûn became a bigger bitch, and Xivu whatever the -blam!- her name is ran off due to daddy issues if I had to guess. It’s what Zavala probably did before he died and got resurrected. Eventually Oryx had kids who basically should’ve been left at the adoption center. Nokris was the nerdy kid really into Worm Didlos, Crota was the bully of the family, and the Sisters (don’t remember their names) were essentially old women that were really into Knitting. Out of the four of them, the sisters may have been Oryxs best kids. And yet the weakest of em probably still lives. Funny eh? We then killed all of em except Savathûn but that bitch will get her ass whooped too. [b]Biology:[/b] Now on the outside, the Hive look like insects. Honestly with all the egg sacs they got on Titan and the Moon (the planet) I’m tempted to say they -blam!- like it too. Now, in actuality they are more like crustaceans, aka that lobster dinner before you use it to get a stomach ache or give Coyote Peterson his next video. Anyhoo, they often switch genders more than someone who’s taking the wrong pills. Now they are born, kill to grow up, and the more they kill the faster they grow. -blam!-ed up, right? [b]Ranks[/b] Gonna be real here, Hive ranks just suck ass to try and name. You got big bois, bad bois, weird kinky witches, etc etc. But I digress, I’ll try. -Thrall: Annoying moths to a flame, aka us -blam!-s! -Acolytes: Cthulhu Cultist wannabes -Knights: Big bois seeking to have kids -Wizards: Bitches with gender name problems and -blam!-ed up scrapbook sessions -Ogres: Big Angry Bois [b]Story Time about Hive Cruelty[/b] Alright alright....alright. I’m gonna drop the hard ass here. I’m gonna tell you a paraphrased story that puts us titans in the darkest shade. Hunters and warlocks may get some sick sense of pride outta this, but Titans sure as -blam!- don’t! It concerns Rezzyl Azzir. Once the best Titan, after Saint-14 of course, sought to kill all the hive on the moon. He of course found em, and after who the -blam!- knows how long, he had killed a Knight who was -blam!-ing this witch that a complete and utter...well...bitch. She said Rezzyl’s Light would die and he’d become the thing he fought. Like Darth Vader, except without the horribly written beginning and cocky childish attitude and with less burns to the dick and metal lungs. Rezzyl didn’t listen, took the bones of the knight (hopefully not the the..err...lower regions) Then, well. He became Dredgen Yor, and created the Shadows of Yor after his death. A group who like to circle jerk the Darkness. So that’s a disgrace to us titans. So do me a favor, AND -blam!-ING BLOW UP EVERY -blam!-ING HIVE HEAD YOU -blam!-ING SEE!! TURN THOSE -blam!-ERS TO ASH AND THEN USE THE ASH TO SMOKE YOUR BLUNTS!! YOUR GHOST WILL -blam!-IN LOVE IT ONCE THE HIVE ARE DEAD AND SNORT THE ASHES HIMSELF!! TURN EVERY HIVE LARVA YOU SEE INTO YOUR OWN PER- Actually never mind that’s too graphic even for here. So you -blam!-in kids go out and BUTCHER THE HIVE!! WHOO!!! I NEED MORE BEER!!!!