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2/1/2013 8:06:35 PM
6

Why are modern animals so unbelievably lame compared to ancient ones?

[url=http://www.cracked.com/article_16117_6-formerly-kickass-creatures-ruined-by-evolution_p2.html]Relevant Cracked article.[/url] Whenever you look through the fossil record, one interesting fact seems clear- for most of the earth's history the planet has been full of vicious death machines that look like they're straight out of the notebook scribblings of a disgruntled teenager. But what do we have today? Bears, lions and hippos would be all jump for the chance to be a bottom bitch to a hyaenodon. Sloths used to be real-life Gutas, and austrailian aborigionals had to fight 20 foot long venom spitting flightless dragons. If god is real then after I die I want to have a long discussion about why he decided to start catering to filthy casuals.

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