The only solution I've found that actually works is logging out, and changing the date/time by a year or two. This forces Bungies servers to push you into your own 'private' instance of the tower/reef. While it doesn't help with the social aspect, it at least lets me deal with quests and vendors without an arbitrary time limit before the servers decide to eject me. Just have to remember to reset clock before trying any matchmaking or patrols.