I think I could write them. See, watch.
"3 Guardians who are never mentioned by name, race, or gender fought an alien Priest, Giant Computer Orb, Nexus Robot, Space Turtle, an Ogre with a laser face, and an AI robot who learned how to not fall off of a ledge thousands of times over and over again. They do this because a little robot directs them too while he waits exactly 3 waves of enemy attacks to open a door. The Guardians returned to the tower because the darkness is retreating, and they were called home."
I'm thinking that I could make approximately $500 million from that.
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