I'll start:
1. Yo mama so fat her appearance is a public event.
2. Yo mama so fat she couldn't collect her engrams from the loot cave.
3. Yo mama so fat when she visits the Tower, she spawns in the hangar.
4. Yo mama so fat Gorgons spot her at the start of the raid.
5. Yo mama so fat when she rides Timebreaker, it explodes immediately.
6. Yo mama so dumb she doesn't gain experience from anything.
7. Yo mama so dumb her Super Good Advice is just Advice.
8. Yo mama so dumb even the collective Vex Minds couldn't educate her.
9. Yo mama so dumb her Intellect is zero, always.
10. Yo mama so dumb she activates her Super just to be normal.
11. Yo mama so ugly she's error code: baboon.
12. Yo mama so ugly seeker rounds fail to seek her.
13. Yo mama so ugly even Xyor the Unwed wouldn't wed her.
14. Yo mama so ugly Bungie let her keep Jackolytes year-round.
15. Yo mama so ugly Atheon voluntarily jumps off the ledge.
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6 RepliesYo mama so fat, when she wears white, Guardians think it's the Traveller! Yo mama so dirty, the Hive have to take a bath after being near her! Yo mama so ugly, when a Gorgon sees her, the Gorgon dies! Yo mama so stupid, she picked up some spinmetal and started rotating! Yo mama so fat, when she wore a black checked shirt, we thought it was a conflux! Yo mama so fat, she makes a Cabal look like a size zero! Yo mama so fat, a ward of dawn shield only protects her ankle! Yo mama so ugly, when she killed a Sunsinger with Fireborn, they stayed down! Yo mama so ugly, she lost to an Acolyte in a beauty contest! Yo mama so ugly, Sekrion keeps his shield over his eyes!