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8/31/2014 8:51:53 PM
102

What. The. Hell. Man.???

I'm waiting in the lobby of my hotel for the shuttle van to take me to the airport. While here a chubby little boy asked for my iPod. I told him no, and he freaked out, started screaming and yelling "give it to me!!!" His mother ran over, and didn't say say sorry, but gave me a dirty look and actually said, "why didn't you just give it to him? This is your fault." I just got up and went outside. He's still freaking out inside, and his mom is talking to the manager, pointing at me. Screw this, I'm about to walk to the airport.
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  • Lemme get this straight. You are standing there, and some random ass kid asks for your iPod, then flips out when you say no? ¿DAFUQ?
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  • 0
    Phosphorus
    Phosphorus

    Castle Jackal, Alucard. - old

    What the Actual F[u]u[/u]ck
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  • Karma's a bitch!
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  • [b] Tyler always conveniently leaves out a couple of important details. Heres how it really went down:[/b] Tyler is waiting in the hotel lobby trying to light an old cigarette butt he found on the ground outside. It's amazing what these people throw away. It truly is the age of consumerism. A child, age about twelve approaches him carefully. [i]"Can I look at your ipod please, sir?"[/i] he says with a polite gesture and a smile. The kid is wearing a tie under his white knit sweater. Shit, he probably even goes to sunday school and praises The Lord. Tyler slowly descends down to the height of the kid, and blows a lung-full of thick billowing smoke in his eyes. "[i]You are not your mothers bible" [/i]he says, as the kid wipes his eyes, now tearing up from the smoke. [i]"You are not your fathers tie" [/i]he continues. The kid starts to cry. [i]"You are not your chocolate chip cookies, you are not your lego-bricks, and you are most certainly not my iPod!"[/i] Tyler continues with a cold tone and a slightly raised voice. [i]"You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake"[/i] He then whispers into the terrified twelve year olds ear, before he grabs a handful of his red hair and slams it into the hotel welcoming counter. Nice custom postcards get tainted with blood and teeth. Tyler then pummels the boy repeatedly in the stomach with a perverse sense of joy, followed by open hand strikes to the jaw and nose. The poor boys face is unrecognizable. Blood and tears flow vigorously around mountainous bruises and cuts. Entrenched in his forehead is a piece of the folder they give out to people on their way in. Tyler throws in a couple more punches, and he doesn't hold back. You cant remove freckles with your fists, but Tyler doesn't seem to care. On his way out he meets the receptionist, on the way back from her break no doubt. [i]"Hey you should really get some security cams in here or something. There where some kids making a mess on your desk."[/i] he casually mentions to her as they pass. These god damn drivers are never on time. Tyler has a plane to catch. And strangers to meet.
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    9 Replies
    • Da fuk
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    • 2
      "What the -blam!- did you just -blam!-ing say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the -blam!- out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my -blam!-ing words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, -blam!-er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re -blam!-ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your -blam!-ing tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re -blam!-ing dead, kiddo."
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      21 Replies
      • 0
        diver2441
        diver2441

        Welcome to urf! - old

        That little blob and his family ought to be sterilized
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      • 0
        hammyman3232
        hammyman3232

        fragile. must be Italian. - old

        Why the -blam!- would he ask for your iPod? What a dumb kid.
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        1 Reply
        • Should should have kicked him in the testicles.
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          1 Reply
          • Kill them both
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          • Dumbass kids.
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          • #America
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          • Id tell him screw off and go bother someone else. Also if questioned I would reprimand the child for being left with that horrible excuse of a mother. [spoiler]also walkings good for you.[/spoiler]
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          • Why don't you tell her to do one?
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          • The outside world is a strange place.
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            7 Replies
            • You should have did this to the mom [spoiler]+100 Renegade[/spoiler]
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            • Hey op can I have your plane tickets? Why not? Mom this guy won't give me his property.
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            • Please tell me you're trolling. People like that surely do not exist. "My son is crying because you won't give him $5,000,000. How dare you. I'm speaking to the manager about this."
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              1 Reply
              • I would of said this: "Hello mildly obese child As you can see this iPod belongs to me If you desperately need one for personal reasons I'm not the one to ask Thanks to the following reasons I paid for it I have private information My Internet history If you are annoyed by this Here Is a chocolate bar" Then when the mother walks up And says this is my fault I'll just load up the b[u]i[/u]tch please meme And put on sunglasses And walk out Then realise my bus isn't here yet And walk back inside
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              • You piece of shit, you're the problem in this country. That little, innocent gift from God only wanted a peak at a piece of technology that I'm sure is well out of his reach for many years to come (as 11 year olds should not have access to technology, they should be outside), and you denied him this formative experience. I hope that you rot in hell, you dirty child abuser.
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                2 Replies
                • 0
                  You should've said "No you can't eat it"
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                • Should have called him obese.
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                • You shoulda kicked him
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                • What a little cockhead
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                • Spoiled little shit.
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                • You should have got your ipod in your hand and slammed it into his nose.
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