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Edited by Lawlzor96: 6/20/2014 8:12:31 PM
4
When I was 13, My whole village tribe was enslaved by the Microsoft Mines in the old Zulu lands of Eyehackabihgllama. We dug for days in search for consoles, without any shovels or pickaxes. I was forced to use the limbs of a small child, who lost his legs after a large mosquito bit him, for work tools. The feet were used for shovels and the kneecap was for chipping away at the soft rock. During my endless days, I became ill with Swahilititis, a disease caused by the use of small children's limbs after falling off due to parasites. My breasts and earlobes sagged unhealthily like an aboriginal. I had explosive diarrhea and had unusual urges to drop it like it was hot, which the mines already were. My diarrhea was more like bursts of forceful air currents, since I was starved and dehydrated. After a while, I lost my Kidney through my bungalow hole. I prayed to the Kool-Aid god that I'd be cured from my ailment and leave the place. My prayers were answered though... The head of Microsoft Mines thought my Kidney stones were rare silicone pieces that he could use for the Kinect. He took them and said that they would be perfect for new memory storage. I was conditionally released from the mines and to a low budget Swahili hospital for my lost Kidney. The condition that got me out was to continue making kidney stone memory chips for the Kinect for the rest of my life, or else Microsoft mines would come back for me. I still have that kids legs.
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