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5/31/2014 12:38:45 AM
13
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When I was about 13 or 14, I jizzed on a pizza by mistake while masturbating in its direction, with my parents and siblings upstairs. I just masturbated in the kitchen then suddenly I had to cum. I tried to make it to the bathroom so I could jizz on the mirror or something, but then I fell dickfirst into the pizza box, and came all over it. I suddenly realized I had came on the pizza my family was going to eat so very quickly I took some bleach wipes and wiped down the pizza, I told my parents I couldn't eat due to being full, and they ate the -blam!-ing pizza o_O The next day or so, my mother announced she was pregnant, and gave birth to my brother (who has mental problems) nine months later. Do you think I impregnated my mother, or is it just some freak coincidence? Please tell me, I've been haunted for over 3 years now.
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I'm more worried about why your mother sticks pizza in her cooze.
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[i]wat[/i]
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( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes. Together we can stop this. Please spread the word ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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(° ͜ʖ°)
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Fresh prince of Bel-air has ruined my life. I memorised the entire theme song and started randomly using it in everyday conversation out of habit. Relationships have started to fall apart, and people have started to avoid me. I don't even try to use it any more. It just comes out, subconsiously. Will Smith has ruined my *** life.
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it probably was you, but you should do it a few more times to try and establish a trend.
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i am a heron. i haev a long neck and i pick fish out of the water w/ my beak. if you dont repost this comment on 10 other pages i will fly into your kitchen tonight and make a mess of your pots and pans
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what if i like messes?
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I need your advice pls. Me and my gf got into a fight recently and she was saying mean stuff. I dont hit women so I panicked and farted into my hand and threw it in her face. Her mouth was open and everything and I kind of feel bad because it wasnt a pleasant smell. She stormed out of the house and we havent spoken in 2 days. pls respond I dont know what to do or say. Pls no copy pastarino
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sudo rm -rf /
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Hello I am a beautiful Mongolian War Princess, endowed with bountiful bosoms and many parts for procreation. I am looking for a white man of USA descent who is willing to have many sex with me and I need ten million rubles in my bank
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