I had actually found a silver gold ring worth about 400 bucks in a river. I was being a dumbass bragging about my near impossible find around a friend of mine who had some kleptomaniac tendencies. I'm almost positive he took it but you know, whatever. I wouldn't have done anything smart with it anyway.
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At least it wasn't his birthday. OR: At least he didn't murder you for it.
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Now how can we be sure he didn't try?...