Hello guardians, and welcome to a special interview i had with Mike the Acolyte... he wanted me Xur, to interview him because he is tired of how the HIVE wants to kill everything, and he justs wants to be friends...
Xur: hello Mike and thank you for letting me sit down with you...
starhorse: wheee spffthhh spftth
Mike: uh, hey... does that thing bite? Anyways, yeah ive been around a long time Xur, i seen a lot of stuff and heard things that OPENED MY EYES... you see Acolytes me in particular, doesnt get any recognition, weapons, or even huge like those damn (am i allowed to say damn?) Knights... it would be nice if we was that cool, but noooo we are the ones that are easy to take down... so Guardians, if you are listening, i get it... I UNDERSTAND... so next time you see us peak around the corner, just smile and wave at us...
Xur: and now lets take it to the phone line, where we have a Guardian on the line.. lets see what they have to say...
Starhorse: WHEEEEE WHEEEEEE
Guardian: uhhh, hello? Hey my name is Greg i go by the name TBAGMASTER69er, anyways yeah u know what Mike, i dont care if you want to be friends, ill tell ya what im gonna do... first im gonna shoot you in the legs, then run up and shoot your arms off, tbag ya then disintegrate tour filthy...
Xur: okay thats all the time we have for tonights show.. please stay tuned for we might have a special guest star... Randal the Vandal... he also has something to say...
Guardian: beep beep beep you mike you beep beep beep..
Mike: *CRYING ALOUD* whyyyyyyy? Stop being so mean,
Guardian: yeah thats right you mother
Que black screen
English
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