[i]OK... had to believe, I thought this series was dying after 3 stories, now I'm starting #12. EDIT: Typo alert. The Last City itself is not 300 years old, so the figure for class musicals (315th) was obviously wrong. The current much lower number is correct.[/i] [b]DRAMATIS PERSONAE[/b] MR. ODDISH, 248. Male Human Sentinel Titan. Has been primary kinderguardian teacher for the Vanguard for nearly a century, less three months. Has a long-suffering Ghost named SIGMUND, Sagira shell. PAULA, 105. Female Human Striker Titan. Dark hair and eyes. Guardian of the City, mother of Petra. Seeing Mr. Oddish regularly now. Has a Ghost named OLIVIA, Entwining Heart shell. VENTIS, 15. Male Stormcaller Warlock. Obsessed with Toland. Member of Bravecole's class. DAWN, 15. Female Sunbreaker Titan. Severely neurotic. Member of BraveCole's class. GLORIA, 12. Female Awoken Voidwalker Warlock. Intermediate kinderguardian. Has a Ghost named ALBUS, male persona, lotus shell. MARSHALL, 11. Male Arcstrider Hunter. Intermediate kinderguardian. DAVID, just turned 10. Male Human Dawnblade Warlock. Despite his age, less experienced than Petra or Ricardo. Has a Ghost named DEVRIM, EDZ shell. LILLIE, 9. Female Human Warlock, unknown subclass. Newly chosen, assigned to Mr. Oddish's primary class. PETRA, 9. Female Human Striker Titan. Insanely cute daughter of Mr. Oddish and Paula. Primary kinderguardian. Has a Ghost named BELLE, female persona (and Emma Watson's voice), yellow princess shell. RICARDO, 8. Male Human Gunslinger Hunter. Has a medal from Zavala (youngest Guardian ever personally decorated by the Vanguard by almost a decade), a Hawkmoon, and an obsession with legendary Gunslinger Malex. Ghost is named SPARKS. STEPHANIE, 6. Preguardian from the Sunnybrook facility. Has had two unsuccessful Ghost-choosing ceremonies (not that unusual). PETER, almost 5. Preguardian from the Sunnybrook facility. Stephanie's younger brother. GROWLER, age unknown. Former Iron Wolf, now an actual wolf (it's complicated) and devoted companion to Petra. CMDR. ZAVALA, age unknown. Titan Vanguard. He and Mr. Oddish don’t really get along. IKORA REY, age unknown. Warlock Vanguard and supervisor of all kinderguardian training, from the preguardian facility to the probationary Guardian program. Several unassigned Ghosts, in service of Ikora Rey. Include LEMON DROPS, TIGER LILY, and IRON HEART Several other Guardians in cameo appearances. TIME: The following begins shortly after the Crimson Days festival, or about two months after the events of "The Secret of Saladin's Wolves". For perspective's sake, it's two years and eight months after "Story Time for Kinderguardians". All events take place within the New Tower. We begin outside the intermediate kinderguardian classroom. Mr. Oddish and Ventis, junior warlock, are having a heated discussion. VENTIS: "I don't actually have to do this, do I?" ODDISH: "The class musical? No, you don't. Instead, you can grab a broom and help Arcite and the Sweeper Bot clean up the rose petals from the Tower." Ventis looks around. The crimson petals have been falling for days, and are three feet deep in places. VENTIS: "You CAN'T be serious." ODDISH: "Hey, rose petals smell better than wolf crap, right?" VENTIS: "Why am I even still here? Brave said I would be a probie soon." ODDISH: "Unfortunately, your thing for Toland and periodically killing yourself has gotten about." VENTIS: "I can't even do that anymore, since Sunsingers are extinct." ODDISH: "It's still common knowledge, And try as she might, Miss Ikora still can't find a warlock crazy enough to mentor you. Now, are you going to be in the musical, or shall I find you a push broom?" Muttering, Ventis enters the elevator and takes it to the auditorium, a few dozen floors below. Oddish follows him in. His four students and Brave's remaining three are waiting for them. ODDISH: "Hello. Welcome to the 35th annual Kinderguardian Class Musical. We have a real treat for the audience this time, since this year we'll be doing 'Mary Poppins'." VENTIS: "Can't we at least do something cool, like 'Sweeney Todd'?" ODDISH: "Small children and cannibalism really don't go well together, Ventis. As our oldest performer, you'll be Mr. Banks. Dawn, you're his wife, Winifred Banks." DAWN: "W-w-what does M-mrs. Banks do?" ODDISH: "Basically, she campaigns to get women the right to vote." PETRA: "Why would she do that? Women already can vote, just like everyone else." GLORIA: "This story is set in 1910, over nine hundred years ago. They couldn't then." DAWN: "W-wow. People were b-barbaric th-then." GLORIA: "Yup. And the funny thing is, they thought they were super civilized." ODDISH: "Gloria, you'll be the titular role. Marshall, you're Bert. David, because you're doing some remedial study and can't come to rehearsal every day, you're Uncle Albert; he's only in one scene. Lillie, you're playing catch-up as well, so you'll be the family's other servant, Cook." PETRA: "And I get to do everything, right?" ODDISH: "That's right, kiddo. You and I are the main ensemble members, though most of you will be asked to help out when your character's not on stage." GLORIA: "Who's going to play the kids?" ODDISH: "Ricardo is Michael. Jane will be played by Stephanie." RICARDO: "But Stephanie didn't get a Ghost yet." ODDISH: "We put out a call for unassigned Ghosts. Stephanie should get picked next ceremony." SIGMUND: "That's what you said last ceremony." VENTIS: "Doesn't Jane have to, like, sing?" ODDISH: "Another reason why I didn't make Petra do it. She inherited many of my abilities, but not my musical ones; she carries a tune about as well as her mother does. Last but not least, Growler will be the Banks family dog." GLORIA: "I don't think they had a dog in the book." ODDISH: "You actually read the book?" GLORIA: "Well, I am a warlock. Reading is kind of what we do." ODDISH: "Good point. Well they have a dog now." He is interrupted when both remaining Vanguards enter the room. Ikora has two small children in tow. Oddish recognizes them as Stephanie and Peter, two preguardians from the Sunnybrook training facility. ODDISH: "Miss Ikora, hello. I didn't know you were coming to rehearsal so early." He greets Zavala with a curt nod, which is rather more than he wants to do. He still blames the imperious Awoken for the Red War. IKORA: "I'm afraid we're here on business, Mr. Oddish. I'm sure you know these two." ODDISH: "Yeah, I see 'em on my Sunnybrook visits. Hi, sweetie." He gives Stephanie a hug. He generally limits such gestures in his class, because Guardians are supposed to be tough. But with preguardians, hugs are acceptable. STEPHANIE: "Sorry I didn't get a Ghost." ODDISH: "Hey, it's not your fault, little princess. Remember, you and your Ghost will be together your whole life, which may be hundreds of years. So they want to find just the right person to be their Guardian." PETER: "What about me?" ODDISH: "Hi, Pete. Good to see you, buddy." (Pete prefers fist-bumps to hugs, so Oddish gives him one before turning his attention to Ikora) "Did you bring them here to watch the rehearsal?" IKORA: "Not exactly... I've agreed to add them to the show's cast." ODDISH: "..." ZAVALA: "As I'm sure you know, their father is a high-ranking member of New Monarchy, on a first-name basis with the executor himself. He’s used to getting what he wants." ODDISH: "Commander, this is a bad idea and you know it. With this many fractious young Guardians in the room, slinging their light helter-skelter, it's very unsafe for anyone who doesn't have a Ghost themself. Tell them we can't do it." IKORA: "He's already told him that we can." ZAVALA: "I have every confidence in your ability to ensure their total safety." ODDISH: "I wish I had equal confidence." ZAVALA: "Aren't you the teacher who's never lost a kinderguardian in a hundred years?" ODDISH: "Yes. But I got to be that teacher by making prudent decisions about safety. Putting preguardians in a show with older kinders is about as prudent as..." ZAVALA (innocently): "Taking a probie on a raid?" ODDISH: "Yeah, that." ZAVALA: "Then it should be right up your alley." ODDISH: "And I suppose when one of those kids gets crisped, disintegrated, or blasted full of holes, it'll be my fault." ZAVALA (smugly): "Of course." ODDISH (sighs): "Is there anything else, or are we done here?" ZAVALA: "We're done." (exits) ODDISH: "Awoken prick." (to Ikora) "Can you talk some sense into him? Preferably before the unthinkable happens?" IKORA: "Commander Zavala and sense are not exactly synonomous. His mind is like concrete: thoroughly mixed and completely set." ODDISH: "OK, I get your point." Part 2 is up: https://www.bungie.net/en/Forums/Post/252060978 Click here to return to Oddish's Index Page: https://www.bungie.net/en/Forums/Post/228589572