Me: Hello Rahool. Happy Dawning! Rahool: Hello Guardian! Need something decrypted? Me: No, just thought I'd give you something to tell you how I feel. Rahool: Why, thank you! *Air drops a massive cargo crate in front of him* Rahool: What... is that? Me: Oh, just a few things you've given me, and I want to return the Favor! Rahool: How do I even open it? Me: Oh, sorry. I'll open it for you. *opens it with bare hands because Titan* Me: Ta-da! Rahool: *coughs on plume of smoke that rises out* What are those? Me: Unlike most guardians in the tower, I kept all of my Edge Transits for the past 3 1/2 months. Rahool: ...um... Me: I thought, "Well, since he gives so many of these out to us guardian folk, I figured he must have a thing for them!" Me: So, to give them a [i]smokey[/i] taste, I put them in Eva Levante's new easybake oven thing, and BOOM! We got all of these! Rahool: Guardian, it's the engrams you pick up, not me. I simply decrypt them... Me: Oh really? Is that so? *walks towards tent behind Rahool* Rahool: NO DON'T GO BACK THERE! THERE ARE DANGEROUS HIVE ARTIFACTS BACK THERE! Me: Rahool, I've spent 4 years with Eris Morn, Killed millions of Hive, and couple of their Gods.[b] I think I will be fine[/b]. *pulls back sheet to reveal a massive storage room, one side containing Hundreds of thousands of edge transits, and the other a massive pile of Powerful Armor, Kinetic, and Power weapons, and a few exotic engrams.* Rahool: *franticly starts to pack up things* Me: And where do you think you are going? I know your secrets, Rahool. Rahool: SHHHHH. *looks around* What do you want from me? Me: I want exotics. Not stuff discovered in the red war, or the Mercury Conflict, or the Hellas basin Conflict, no. I want to new stuff. Ursa Furiosa, 2-tailed Fox, Black Talon. And I don't want to ever see another Edge transit from your sorry face ever again. Rahool: ALRIGHT ALRIGHT! Just keep your voice down ok? Me: Ok then. Enjoy your Smoked Edge transits, buddy! Rahool: *picks up com* 999-999-9999 Xur: Yes? Rahool: Alright dude, the jig is up. People are starting to figure out what we have going here. Some Titan just discovered the stash. Xur: ...well thats rather unfortunate. Meet me on Titan tomorrow morning. Rahool: *hangs up* Why did I have to get involved in this.... [i]To be continued...[/i] EDIT: I can make a sequel if you guys want... EDIT 2, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO: So guys, we did it. A quarter of a thousand upvotes... Part 2: https://www.bungie.net/en/Forums/Post/250143492?showBanned=0&path=0