You can't improve yourself, because the person who would supposedly do the improving is the same person who needs improvement. A bad surgeon can't perform good surgery on himself. The only problem you have is that you think you should be better than you are. The solution is therefore to stop thinking you should be better and accept who you are now, warts and all. Accept everything; even accept the parts of you that can't accept. It might take a while, it might not take a while, but it won't happen if you keep thinking you should be better than you are.
No one can help you with that.
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I have missed you.