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7/20/2005 9:44:44 PM
11
Buy my laptop, -blam!-s!
I'm selling my laptop computer because I'm moving to San Diego and it's a big expensive city where it'd probably just get stolen anyway. The specs are:
Toshiba 4320
Pentium III 600mhz
64 MB Ram
6 gig HD
DVD ROM
Windows XP Professional
Word, etc... whatever kind of software you want
This fat waitress was going to buy it for college next year. I showed it to her and she instantly started barking nonsense, trying to come off smart to let me know I couldn't fool her. She was like, "Hmmm.. interesting..." "What?" I asked. "It seems that the PCI modulator has lost all its megadrives." Like the gentleman I am, I went along with it, "Actually Nicole, the ROM frequency overrides the DHCP with its E3 UDP Unreal 2004 magnum -blam!- overdrive." She shut up.
After messing with it for an hour and a half, she came to the conclusion not to buy it because the F7 key is missing. Well, the key isn't missing, only the plastic cover that says F7. The key is still functionally fine.
It's cool that she didn't buy it, I just don't understand what she was doing that whole time. How can it take nearly 2 hours to figure out that a key is missing? Did the girl stare at the row of F keys thinking, "Damn... There are only 11 F keys! What's missing? I don't get it. They go up to 12, but I only count 11... Hmm.. This would be a lot easier if I had 12 fingers. What a gyp. God damn. I see a key with nothing written on it between the 6 and the 8. Could that be the seven? I don't know! What could this mean? Is it F13? Maybe it's just F. Maybe it loads an F-Zero ROM. Maybe it's a secret button that will launch me through the air in a glass elevator. Maybe it's the self destruct button?? Maybe not!?! I DON'T KNOW! AHH! BRAIN ANEURISM!"
It's F7. That's like 4% cosmetic blemish and 96% who-gives-a--blam!-. Honestly, how often do you push F7? Is it really that much of an inconvenience to push a plastic thing instead of a key once every 6 months? Anyway, she no longer works there because I I fired her (framed her to be responsible for breaking the boss's bong).
[Edited on 7/20/2005]
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Spam is spam.
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I thought his rants were entertaining
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Soup in pants Why did he get blacklisted?[/quote] It's spam.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Soup in pants Why did he get blacklisted?[/quote] Mabe it's all the plagiarism.........
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Why did he get blacklisted?
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I wouldn't but that thing if it came with a free hot tub!
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no thanks
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That is prolly one of the funniest things i've read in awhile. Thanks. How much is it going for?
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You had a sale until you mentioned the missing F7 key you see thats my favourite. On my laptop it turns the touch pad on and off so whenever i lend it to people i always disable it then when they tell me its not working i make out that they broke it.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] darklordsmiley I'm selling my laptop computer because I'm moving to San Diego and it's a big expensive city where it'd probably just get stolen anyway. The specs are: Toshiba 4320 Pentium III 600mhz 64 MB Ram 6 gig HD DVD ROM Windows XP Professional Word, etc... whatever kind of software you want This fat waitress was going to buy it for college next year. I showed it to her and she instantly started barking nonsense, trying to come off smart to let me know I couldn't fool her. She was like, "Hmmm.. interesting..." "What?" I asked. "It seems that the PCI modulator has lost all its megadrives." Like the gentleman I am, I went along with it, "Actually Nicole, the ROM frequency overrides the DHCP with its E3 UDP Unreal 2004 magnum -blam!- overdrive." She shut up. After messing with it for an hour and a half, she came to the conclusion not to buy it because the F7 key is missing. Well, the key isn't missing, only the plastic cover that says F7. The key is still functionally fine. It's cool that she didn't buy it, I just don't understand what she was doing that whole time. How can it take nearly 2 hours to figure out that a key is missing? Did the girl stare at the row of F keys thinking, "Damn... There are only 11 F keys! What's missing? I don't get it. They go up to 12, but I only count 11... Hmm.. This would be a lot easier if I had 12 fingers. What a gyp. God damn. I see a key with nothing written on it between the 6 and the 8. Could that be the seven? I don't know! What could this mean? Is it F13? Maybe it's just F. Maybe it loads an F-Zero ROM. Maybe it's a secret button that will launch me through the air in a glass elevator. Maybe it's the self destruct button?? Maybe not!?! I DON'T KNOW! AHH! BRAIN ANEURISM!" It's F7. That's like 4% cosmetic blemish and 96% who-gives-a--blam!-. Honestly, how often do you push F7? Is it really that much of an inconvenience to push a plastic thing instead of a key once every 6 months? Anyway, she no longer works there because I I fired her (framed her to be responsible for breaking the boss's bong).[/quote] Yet another funny rant! Keep 'em coming!
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