Vault space has been doubled but only for armor.
You can now trade radiant mats into the shipwright for ascendant mats. Also crucible marks can now be traded for vanguard but not visa versa.
Survival mode added. Consists of you fighting Randal the vandal hand to hand with no loot drop.
Grimoire can now only be accessed via a Wal Mart wifi connection.
Existing cutscenes have been removed.
Character appearance is now completely randomized.
All bounties now consist of kill three fallen walkers as was our original intention.
Lightswitch has been added to all missions and nightfalls no longer have burns.
Shaders have been removed to make the game more uniform.
Crota's End sparrow has been nerfed. Now compariable to a vespa.
To balance all weapons impact has been decreased on all hand cannons and scout rifles while increasing rate of fire. Also all hand cannons have a 3 round magazine.
Sword bearer now drops a wooded sword that despawns after 3 seconds and containment shields now spawn accross the map from you. Heavy ammo synths give primary ammo.
Queens wrath is back with light 27 armor.
Increase chances of getting centipede errors.
5 new strikes have been added. All of which are Nintendo exclusive.
Thanks again for your unwaivering support.
Bungie
Edit 1: oh boy we're trending. Maybe its because nobody read it and just bumped it, or maybe people just said fck it and bumped it. Whatever, keep it up. We will be heard!
Edit 2: due to the public being upset about cutscenes being removed, we have elected to bring them back. There now will be twice as many all voice acted by Steven Seagal. Still unskippable.
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Lol trizkit its your boy OBEEY Hahahaha
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The joke is we actually half expect updates like these.
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Damn I was so looking forward to no cutscenes!
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I cri erytime :'(
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Edited by Apex of War: 1/26/2015 11:00:17 PMYou forgot one: The sweeping robot is now mopping.
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Keep it up and this will be reported as spam for it is the same as the last post that was deleted for being spam.
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This was funny!!
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Hire this guy!
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Holy hell I'm ROFL now. Good stuff and I actually thought it might have been from bungie. Hell I still think it might be.
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Too funny
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I'm crying lol. Thank you
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Holy hell this is funny
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Not possible to beat Randal in hand to hand that's why there's no loot if you beat him you get all the exotics
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[b]Edit:[/b]Thought about this for the Devils lair strike. Take a look: "The spammers will continue to claw the walls of our city. Beneath the ruins of #destiny, and with Intel we've located the house of spammers lair, and the high post, feeding them their strength. We must destroy this thread God, and send their souls screaming back to hell."
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[insert line from The Comedian shotgun here]
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This is really well done. I applaud you.
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I really missed these patch notes. Love it
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lmao this is awesome.
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Lets hope they don't make any of these happen as punishment for spammin the update we will never get posts
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[quote]Grimoire can now only be accessed via a Wal Mart wifi connection.[/quote] This made me lol.
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Not funny bro. Don't give them bad ideas.