Title says it all, bring forth your crap comedy, your plain punch lines, all is welcome.
To kick it off with an example: [i]Why did the football coach go to the bank[/i]
[spoiler][i]to get his Quarter... [b]back[/b][/i][/spoiler]
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What do you call a teacher afraid to fart in public? [spoiler]A private tutor[/spoiler]
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What concert can you go to for only 45 cents? [spoiler]50 cent featuring nickle-back [/spoiler]
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Where did the vampire deposit his money? [spoiler]At the blood bank.[/spoiler]
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If Iron Man and Silver Surfer teamed up... [spoiler]they'd be [i]alloys[/i][/spoiler]
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This is the best joke I've ever made up ever. Colon and semicolon were sitting on a log. Semicolon falls off, who's left? (You have to answer one or the other fgts)
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Edited by Greene: 12/14/2013 11:00:04 PMHere are some: [spoiler]A policeman stopped me the other night, he taps on the window of the car and says: 'Would you please blow into this bag, Sir'. I said: 'What for, Officer?' He says: 'My chips are too hot'.[/spoiler] [spoiler]I got stopped again last night by another policeman. He says: 'I'd like to follow you to the nearest Police Station'. I said 'What For?'. He said: 'I've forgotten the way'.[/spoiler] [spoiler]I had a meal last night, I ordered everything in French, surprised everybody, It was a Chinese restaurant.[/spoiler] [spoiler]I went to the doctor the other day I said 'have you got anything for wind' so he gave me a kite.[/spoiler] Thank you, goodnight, much love. And I totally didn't steal any of these.
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What do you call a man who gets walked all over? [spoiler]Matt[/spoiler]
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What do you get if you cross a shark with a parrot? [spoiler]An animal that talks your head off.[/spoiler]
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What do liars do when they die? [spoiler]Lie still.[/spoiler]
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What is the difference between a mouse and a beautiful girl? [spoiler]The mouse harms the cheese, and the girl harms the he's. lol This one makes absolutely no sense.[/spoiler]
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What people are like the end of a book? [spoiler]The Finnish.[/spoiler]
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What people do the most traveling? [spoiler]The Romans.[/spoiler]
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What is the right kind of timber for castles in the air? [spoiler]Sunbeams.[/spoiler]
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You wanna hear a joke about pizza?[spoiler] never mind its too cheesy...... Badum tzzzzz!! [/spoiler]
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Edited by Dafuq: 12/14/2013 11:23:27 PMWhat goes through a door but never goes in or out? [spoiler]A keyhole.[/spoiler]
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What did the dog say when he sat on the sandpaper? [spoiler] Ruff, ruff.[/spoiler]
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What can go over the water and through the water without getting wet? [spoiler]Sunlight.[/spoiler]
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Edited by Dafuq: 12/14/2013 11:31:39 PMWhat time of day can you spell the same backward and forward? [spoiler]Noon.[/spoiler]
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What city is a small stone? [spoiler]Little Rock.[/spoiler]
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What is a horse sense? [spoiler]Just stable thinking.[/spoiler]
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What kind of policeman enjoys his work most? [spoiler]A traffic policeman, because he whistles while he works.[/spoiler]
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What's the highest building in New York City? [spoiler]The library. It has the most stories.[/spoiler]
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Why don't lobsters share [spoiler]Theyre shellfish.[/spoiler]
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Why do ghosts like to ride elevators? [spoiler]It raises their spirits.[/spoiler]