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Edited by Papa Prosciutto:
2/4/2016 2:39:50 AM
67
~ A gift to the offtopic~
This is my little gift to you:
News about a much larger gift. THE BEST THING EVER.
I'm about to tell some of you something you've never heard, and don't give me hate, because i don't want any attention.
First of all, one of the easiest things to do is to believe.
1. Nothing bad has come from the belief and trust in God.
-if you say that people are murdered for their religion, just be private about it.
2. From the beginning of mankind, religion has been accepted and practiced.
Second of all, there is a man named Jesus.
1. 2000 years ago, a child was born from a virgin's womb.
-this has been proven true by historical FACTS.
2. Jesus came to earth for one purpose: DIE.
-he is perfect. He is God. He died for YOU!
Jesus died to give us a simple GIFT. A free gift. No strings attached. No fee. Nothing. All you have to do is accept it. What is this gift, you ask. This is the gift of eternal life. Nobody else is perfect except for the one who came to DIE. Think about it. The ONLY PERFECT HUMAN BEING EVER TO EXIST DIED FOR YOU!!!!!!!! HE LOVES YOU SO MUCH!!!! Since we are not perfect, we must be punished for sin. That punishment is DEATH. Not physical death, but spiritual death. HELL. Eternal suffering. But since God loves you ENOUGH TO DIE, he provided you with eternal life. Just accept it. It's so easy. Just say with your mouth," I am a sinner. Jesus died in my place," and believe it in your heart, too. That's literally it. It seems too easy, many say. Well it's called a gift. So don't be afraid. Accept Jesus. He loves you. :) He knows you.
That's the easy gift of Christ. You don't have to be perfect. He loves you just the way you are. I hope you accept the gift. I personally want to see you in heaven when your short time on earth is done. Because it will end. But that's just the beginning of a perfect life with the man who died for you.
-The DankJanitor, signing off. Wishing you joy.-
P.S.
Please answer the poll with your decision, I'd like to know. You don't have to, but please do.
Edit 1: I told you not to hate but some of you did anyway. Anyway, I left for like, a week and got 81 comments, even though they were mostly hate or saying that this was bait.
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Wait a minute, Jesus died? Thanks for spoiling the bible for me. [spoiler]Reported.[/spoiler]
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I'm religious and people like you legitimately scare me. Also, people like you are the reason argumentative atheists exist, be you trolling or not. Live and let live. Trying to convince others isn't right. Let people believe what they want and what their own life experiences teach them to believe. They don't need to learn from the word of some stranger.
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1 ReplyBy he glory of Christianity brought to you by: [u][b]DANKJANITOR[/b][/u] DANK JANITOR
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1 ReplyI'd prefer to have a puppy ( ^ω^)
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5 Replies[quote]Jesus died to give us a simple GIFT. A free gift. No strings attached. No fee. Nothing.[/quote]...I like the part where you leave out the fact we have to recognize him as our lord and savior.
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Sorry to tell you this, but religion was used as stories for when science wasn't advanced to figure stuff out. Now am I going to hate just because of that? No. I wouldn't do that. I just have difficulty believing in stuff like that. Also, the whole religion causing wars thing is due to Social Darwinism.
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2 RepliesThanks for the gift bby ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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3 RepliesEdited by Meatball: 1/31/2016 7:48:28 PMGet the fuсk outta here! People like you are why Christians catch so much shit. Because bible thumping radicals , like you, think they have to go around shoving your religion in peoples faces. Well, news flash, IT'S NOT GONNA WORK. [spoiler]NEVER.[/spoiler] So please, tear down this thread and spare yourself of anymore shit you're gonna get. [spoiler]Obviously not all Christians shove religion down other people's throats. I'm talking about just the radicals, if you couldn't tell already.[/spoiler]
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Instructions unclear, summoned Dark Lord Satan
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Edited by Riot Actual: 2/5/2016 7:10:13 AMHm...
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I only look up to satan [spoiler]jk i only look up to myself[/spoiler]
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As a previously baptised Christian (not anymore), you can piss off.
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Putting it out there I love it
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[quote]This is my little gift to you: News about a much larger gift. THE BEST THING EVER. I'm about to tell some of you something you've never heard, and don't give me hate, because i don't want any attention. First of all, one of the easiest things to do is to believe. 1. Nothing bad has come from the belief and trust in God. -if you say that people are murdered for their religion, just be private about it. 2. From the beginning of mankind, religion has been accepted and practiced. Second of all, there is a man named Jesus. 1. 2000 years ago, a child was born from a virgin's womb. -this has been proven true by historical FACTS. 2. Jesus came to earth for one purpose: DIE. -he is perfect. He is God. He died for YOU! Jesus died to give us a simple GIFT. A free gift. No strings attached. No fee. Nothing. All you have to do is accept it. What is this gift, you ask. This is the gift of eternal life. Nobody else is perfect except for the one who came to DIE. Think about it. The ONLY PERFECT HUMAN BEING EVER TO EXIST DIED FOR YOU!!!!!!!! HE LOVES YOU SO MUCH!!!! Since we are not perfect, we must be punished for sin. That punishment is DEATH. Not physical death, but spiritual death. HELL. Eternal suffering. But since God loves you ENOUGH TO DIE, he provided you with eternal life. Just accept it. It's so easy. Just say with your mouth," I am a sinner. Jesus died in my place," and believe it in your heart, too. That's literally it. It seems too easy, many say. Well it's called a gift. So don't be afraid. Accept Jesus. He loves you. :) He knows you. That's the easy gift of Christ. You don't have to be perfect. He loves you just the way you are. I hope you accept the gift. I personally want to see you in heaven when your short time on earth is done. Because it will end. But that's just the beginning of a perfect life with the man who died for you. -The DankJanitor, signing off. Wishing you joy.- P.S. Please answer the poll with your decision, I'd like to know. You don't have to, but please do.[/quote] [quote]The DankJanitor, signing off. Wishing you joy[/quote] [quote]The DankJanitor[/quote] I think that you copied and pasted this.... [spoiler]I've also seen this comment a few days ago[/spoiler]
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My gift to you is simply to say that your gift waa not accepted.
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-triggered-
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1 Reply[i]"On the blood of our fathers, on the blood of our sons, we swore to uphold the Covenant!"[/i]
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Is dis bait?
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I don't know why this always gets stuck in my brain but the most mystifying part of all of this for me has always been that a virgin female somehow gives birth to a boy... Despite not having a Y chromosome to pass on. Like if God was gonna dunk a mystical Y chromosome up into Mary, why not just build Jesus out of dust or something like he did with the original man? Why go through the entire pregnancy process in an unmarried virgin? A process, I might add, that could have gotten her killed.
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3 RepliesToo bad. I'm a Catholic whore, currently enjoying congress out of wedlock with my black Jewish boyfriend who works at a military abortion clinic. So hail Satan and have a good day
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Gr8 B8 much H8™
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1 ReplyOdin? Just a fairy tale Hindu Gods? Another fiction story The other 3000+ Gods? Your joking right? God and Jesus? Oh, they're real!
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What is this bullshit?
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Kindly state why? Let's see. You're wrong. (Proven true by historical FACTS!)
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Why? Because I don't believe in it.
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2 Replies[quote]No strings attached[/quote] *Stifled laughter
