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10/27/2011 7:47:21 AM
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Flood I am writing you a story...

Flood I have decided to write you an Epic story that might just span more than 4 paragraphs, this is what I have so far, I hope you enjoy it. And please give me tips on things I should change and any ideas for story would be most welcome. I have already had a thread for this story but I have now combined all that I have wrote so far, please make comments and you may ask to be included in my story. I also wouldn't mind any story ideas, it would be most helpful. [b]Lost Tales of the Flood: An unexpected draft[/b] There is a small house carved into the side of a hill, surrounded by lush beautiful green hills and small pine trees. Now a house carved into the side of a hill might seem peculiar to you and I, but to the small village known as Floodia it was common architecture. Floodia, was a small village in the world known as the internet. It did not have the infamy and evils of 4chan (the cess pool of the land of Internets) nor did it have the flocks of all sorts of odd folk like Facebook, it wasn't abandoned like MySpace and it wasn't big on markets and trading as eBay; No, Floodia was a peaceful place, well, as peaceful as the world of the Internet can be. But the flamewars are never big and the protectors of Floodia ,known as ninja's are always close by to stop any threat, even if that means sentencing innocent folk to a three day sentence... Villages of Floodia, or Floodians as they are known as, are a short (though some are rather lanky), "humble" and hairy people, most of them are of fairer skin due to their love of the safe confines of a warm house (this is why they tend to live underground). There is the pony lovers to the east, the fan boys to the west and the Dinklberg's and town drunks to the north and south ends of town. Hmmm it appears that I have have gotten rather ahead of myself... Upon the porch of this humble little home sits a mid sized scruffy bearded Floodian smoking a long wooden pipe, with an old broken book laying flat upon his chest. This man, is Good Travis (well, if of course a Floodian can even be considered). Good Travis might not have been the most well respected of the Floodians, but he was very well known. He loved the attention, even if it was more infamy than fame. Good Travis, as he is called, was once noted as being like The Floodian's dog, he collected what they had thrown away, pissed on their posts, humped ladies legs and never bathed. But Good Travis longed for an adventure,much like a fruit wants to be stolen or teh puma longs for his prey. He loved the storys of old, the adventure ones, in fact Good Travis had probably read all the books in Floodia (exept the girly ones by Rhea). Good Travis wished long and hard for his own adventure, and one day it found him... (As did pubic lice, but that stroy can wait) [url=http://img805.imageshack.us/img805/531/goodtravis2.jpg]A picture of Good Travis[/url] It was a cold spring morning, yet rather sunny when Recon number 54 arrived. He was riding an old white horse who appeared to have quite alot of trouble making its way up the hill. The horse's mane and Recons long grey beard appeared as one, a normal Floodian would not be able to tell the difference, even if they were having a closer inspection. He wore a long grey cloak and has a brimmed wizards hat. He had bushy eyebrows like that on a caveman and carried a long staff in which he called his [i]ban-hammer[/i]. Recons trips to Floodia were short and few, but when he came around it was either to stir up the already rabid Floodian children with crazy stories from the great north, or to announce some crazy plan of his. Almost all Floodians knew is that when they saw Recon number 54 riding into town, peace would not stay for long. Children chased after recon as they usually do when an old mysterious man rides into town, Recon of course just smiled and waved and made his way around town. Recon was of the ancient and powerful order known as the Moderators; their job is to keep the world of the Internet safe. Recon is the oldest and therefore most well respected of the mods. But his arm only reaches as far as the realm known as Bungie. Recon rode on his stumbling horse until he reached Mr Good Travis's gate. He pulled an old rag out from his brown leather bag and wiped his forehead. "Asleep on the job are you" asked Recon "I am not sleeping, and nor am I working" replied Good Travis "And nor do you ever. So what is it that you are doing outside in the cold like this, when usually a Floodian of your age and calibre are doing their daily poop and then only just getting out of bed" "If you must know, I always wake at this time, as my mother once said the early bird gets the worm and the earlier man shoots the bird and makes it into some type of pie". Good Travis paused for a moment." Now if you don't mind me asking what are you doing back in Floodia?" asked Good Travis with a smirk. Recons face grew grim, "I bring great tidings from the north" Travis slowly raised his right eyebrow above his left. "They're building an army" said recon, lowering both his bushy eyebrows. "They have already breached the gates to the north that keeps us safe from the dark trolls of the Internets; they are slowly coming towards the city of Floodopolis from the several mountains of Bungie" "Who Recon? who would do such thing?" asked Travis. "Spammers my dear boy...and if I am correct this peaceful village will remain so no longer" Recon said while adjusting his hat. "What do you purpose we do then?" "Um,we?" replied Recon "Well I don't think an old man like yourself could carry a task such as this on his own" "Number one, I am no man; I am a Forum ninja, a moderator and two I have not yet revealed my plan" "fair enough" said Good Travis "Hmmm, are you entirely sure you want to come along? What about your parents? Will they be okay with this?" asked Recon "My parents are dead, remember that fishing trip? It was during one of their monthly arguments, mum pushed dad into the lake and dad pulled mom down with him. Meaning that I am the last in my family, the last Travopian, I'm no longer tied down, more like tied up with the perils of this quest" Recon looked surprised. "I'm sorry for your loss, I take it that there is no convincing you otherwise?" "Nope" "Well then, pack lightly; we shall head off tomorrow morning to Morningwood to warn them of the incoming attack, and possibly buy some bagels...mmm, bagels". [Edited on 10.27.2011 12:19 AM PDT]
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Good Travis [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] CruddiestBlock1 [url=http://i55.tinypic.com/9jq5a0.jpg]TL;DR[/url][/quote] Then why post? [Part 5][/quote] To express thoughts on this piece of literature...
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] CruddiestBlock1 [url=http://i55.tinypic.com/9jq5a0.jpg]TL;DR[/url][/quote] Then why post? [Part 5] [Edited on 10.27.2011 10:55 PM PDT]
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  • [url=http://i55.tinypic.com/9jq5a0.jpg]TL;DR[/url]
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  • Part 3 is now up... [Part 4 here] [Edited on 10.27.2011 10:55 PM PDT]
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Voxeril Wait I though Good Travis was dead? Was that non-cannon.[/quote] He was revived with the power of friendship. However Evil Travis is dead as is Epic Travis and Neutral Travis is on holidays. Good Travis also appears to be off the good juice... Oh -blam!- lock incoming and a ban for all of us... RUN!!! Oh why did I post this again... hmmm, this does not belong in the community forums dammit... [Edited on 10.27.2011 12:15 PM PDT]
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  • Wait I though Good Travis was dead? Was that non-cannon.
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  • [b]Part 3:[/b] Good Travis and Recon slowly made their way out of Floodia. Crossing the bridge near the famous Floodian windmills. The weather wasn't entirely inviting, it had begun to rain lightly. The weather could not decide whether to pour down rain or to not, therefore the weather seemed to have an odd resemblance to a teenage girl. It took them around about an hour to escape from the country side of Floodia. The green endless hills disappeared and in their place were big gray rocks on either side of them, pine trees, and an odd bluish green moss. The light had grown dark, the forest whistled and talked to one and other but the wind did not reach them. The horses let out a small burp and came to a holt. "What's wrong?" asked Good Travis "Trolls" "But why would there be trolls so close to Floodia?" "These are dangerous forests, and if I am correct, a dangerous time" Good Travis shifted his eyes from side to side and slowly moved his hand towards his blade. The srubs moved up and down, and then from side to side. "I think there is something behind those scrubs" "Stay still, my boy" Then out from behind Good Travis jumped a hideous troll, pouncing on his pray and knocking Travis to the ground. The troll licked his lips. "Looks like we caughts something Jane...Shane would be proud" The troll was an ugly beast, naked except for a loin cloth and even then is jingles jangled. He carried a short silver blade in his right hand, and in his left was a large brown bag and a rope. Another troll stepped out from behind a tree. "What is it?" asked the troll "Some type of man" "I think the real question is will it blend?" The trolls grinned. Travis layed still, for the troll had a knife at his neck. "Wait, didn't he have a friend?" "What?" "Yeah I saws him, there was two of them, I'm sure of it" Recon was no where to be seen. "No. I think there was only one..." A blinding blast of light came as Recon drove his ban hammer straight into the skull of one of the trolls. Blood sprayed s if a water balloon had just been popped. Good Travis kicked the troll off his chest and Recon sun around, stabbing his staff through the stomach of the second troll. "Never let your guard down" "What if I see a nice looking lass walking by in these parts?" "Never. Not even for bagels" Recon and Travis remounted their positions atop of the carriage. "Morningwoods not that far from here" said Recon, cracking his knuckles. "When we say [i]not far[/i], we mean?" "We'll get there by morning" "That's not that bad" "On Sunday" The talking stopped at that moment... [Edited on 10.27.2011 10:44 PM PDT]
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] OoCarpetoO So recon is the pedo bear with a beard?[/quote] No, but the Pedo Bear does appear later on in the story. [Edited on 10.27.2011 10:57 PM PDT]
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  • So recon is the pedo bear with a beard?
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  • So where does the sex come in?
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Ronald Reagan So you fantasized yourself going on an adventure with a moderator? I can't tell if you are sucking up or not.[/quote] Maybe... Or maybe Recon is a wise old wizard. hmmm, maybe Old Papa Rich would have been a better fit... [Edited on 10.27.2011 2:13 AM PDT]
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] BROWN HAWK That drawing is awesome. Sorry, I didn't read the story. Later, perhaps, if you behave. [/quote] [url=http://img805.imageshack.us/img805/531/goodtravis2.jpg]I have updated it...[/url]
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  • That drawing is awesome. Sorry, I didn't read the story. Later, perhaps, if you behave.
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  • So you fantasized yourself going on an adventure with a moderator? I can't tell if you are sucking up or not.
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  • [b]PART TWO:[/b] Night fall soon came, as if it was the Usain bolt of the time of the day. Recon number 54 eventually decided to stay the night at Good Travis's home. And for once there was not a single strange female walking around in her underwear asking for monkey man to come back to bed in sight...hmmm, I appear to have gotten ahead of myself. Anywho, the house seemed alot bigger on the inside. Doors to rooms were round. There was a round table in the middle of what could be called a living room (if any Floodian could even be considered alive) and off to the side was a fire place as tall and wide as Pinkamena Pie's ego. Good Travis was in the kitchen preparing dinner and tea. Recon was sitting at the round table, with his hat placed in the middle, and his eyes fixated on the fire. "So you want us to travel to all the cities in the province of Bungie and ask them to prepare an army to fight these so called spammers?" questioned Good Travis while carrying tea, bagels and chicken to the table. "Why yes" replied Recon while grabbing a plate. "And by all the towns, you mean all the towns and cities including the Reach forum?" "We need every able bodied man if we wish to survive, even if they are feral they still can fight. As for the evils that are marching in, they are spammers, trolls, and their armies are in the thousands, if we lose the city of Floodopolis many other great towns and cities will follow, including in fact Floodia" "but what about the ninjas?" asked Travis "What about them?" replied Recon while taking a sip from his tea "Will they fight?" "Moderators are in the few these days, I highly doubt we could find any willing to help us..." said recon while gnawing away at a chicken leg. "What about bobcast, the great healer/ninja of the east?" "If we can find him my dear boy, now eat, take your minds off such things. Our journey is tomorrow, today we should rest" And with that Good Travis took his seat. When Good Travis had woken up, he found Recon sitting on the front of his bed smoking a long pipe. He had a worried look on his face, and was kicking his orange flip-flops from side to side while twisting his long ban-hammer round in circles. "You're late" said Recon "As I always am" replied Travis "I have taken the liberty of preparing breakfast, bacon and eggs this morning, with a side of bagels. I have already had my share" "Alright" and with that Good Travis jumped out of bed fully clothed and proceeded to go and eat. After breakfast Travis prepared his things. He grabbed his pipe, green jacket and his sword. As Recon said, they must travel rather lightly. "come on now, if yo're not here in 5 seconds i'm leaving you here, you take around about as long as my wife" yelled Recon. Good Travis was always one to take his time with things; at least that's what the Floodian women had to say about him. He rushed to Recon as fast he could, slaming the door behind him. Recon looked down at him from his carriage. "Was that really necessary?" asked Recon with a warm smirk on his face. "Maybe...I had to kill the black people trying to sneak into my home" Recon smirked. "Ah, you Floodians. So innocent and peaceful compared to the rest of the Internet. You know i'm almost glad that hardly anyone knows of Floodia. after all we don't want any new -blam!-s" "maybe some new ladies" "Again, we live in the land of the Internets, in the province of Bungie, must I say more. Now let us make hast, i'm sure our friends at Morningwood are waiting for us" Travis climbed onto Recon's carriage right next to him; it appeared that he had got two new horses, and had packed. "I don't remember seeing this when you came last night" "Neither do I, but hey, new stuff...been packing all night" Recon whipped the horses a bit and they began their journey. [b]To be continued[/b] [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prZ4RWWku7Y]The story is also wrote in sync with the Lord of the Rings Main theme...bahahahahah.[/url] [Edited on 10.27.2011 10:15 PM PDT]
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