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8/28/2009 9:16:54 PM
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The Neotoric Sovereign of Bel-Air

This is a tale explaining the manner in which my way of life was rotated along a Y axis until it reached a position roughly 180 degrees from that which it started. If I could have 60 seconds of your time, simply place your posterior in the selected location and I will relate to you the details of how I was made the male monarch of the disctrict of the City of Los Angeles, California commonly referred to as Bel-Air. (Coordinates 34.08333 -118.44778) In the western region of the "City of Brotherly Love" known as Philadelphia my mother expelled me from her womb, and indeed, that is also where I spent my childhood in my mother's care. The majority of my time was spent in a recreational area containing such diversions as a jungle gym, swing set, sand box, etc. I was typically at the height of leisure while frequently at a temperature slightly below what might be considered standard room temperature. Outside of my educational institution I was engaging in a game of basketball with some of my friends when a couple of gentlemen who seemed to be of the disposition to cause a great deal of mischief began causing a great deal of chaos and disharmony in the area in which I lived. I was involved in one rather small bout of fisticuffs after which my mother became concerned for my general safety and well-being and she informed me that I would be moving in with her sister and her sister's husband in the previous mentioned community of Bel-Air. I implored my mother to relent approximately 24-48 hours ago, yet she gathered my belongings in a somewhat flat, rectangular shaped piece of luggage and expelled me from her presence. She placed her lips upon my cheek in an affectionate manner and handed me a pre-purchased pass for public transportation. I placed the headphones for my personal music system into my ears and verbalized the idea that I may as well impact this situation with my foot. Traveling in the highest available level of comfort, this is indeed an unfortunate situation (although I make this statement with some irony). Consuming the juices obtained by the squeezing of the fruit of a Citrus sinensis from a piece of glass stemware commonly reserved for the sipping of sparkling wine originating from the Champagne region of France I pause to wonder if this is indeed how the residents of the admittedly upper-class neighborhood of Bel-Air commonly live, indeed I find this situation may be rather to my enjoyment. I puckered my lips and exhaled forcefully to produce a shrill note in order to gain the attention of a taxicab driver and as the driver approached, I observed his California vanity plate, which in place of alpha-numeric characters, used only the letters F, R, E , S and H, spelling out the word [i]"fresh"[/i] and from his rearview mirror dangled a pair of oversized, fur-covered cubes decorated to look like the six-sided dice commonly used in gambling and board games. In such a situation I could have made a statement about the unusualness of this particular taxicab to the point of it being nearly unique. Instead, I cogitatively decided against it and instead informed the driver that he should deliver me to what was to become my new home in the community of Bel-Air. We pulled up to a large domicile sometime between the hours of over 9,000 and 8 o' clock and in a loud tone of voice I informed the cab driver that at some undetermined point in the future I would again detect his odor through my sense of olfaction. I gazed about the region of land that I was destined to rule, reflecting on my arrival where I would claim my rightful place upon the throne, from which I would govern the community of Bel-Air as monarch. [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F4BQxpXYPk8]tl;dr[/url] [Edited on 08.28.2009 1:20 PM PDT]
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  • *swoops in* *destroys fun* This thread does not begin or encourage any valid topic for discussion. *leaves*
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    1 Reply
    • Good, good.
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    • Lulzy, now if you could do that with the Danny Phantom theme song I would be most impressed.
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    • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] CoffeeBlackMetal Indeed, it gave me an audible chuckle.[/quote] Quite
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    • My smiley face just came on!
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    • Excepptionaly Perfect Iincreadible Cool Worth it Ingeinous Neat
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    • Hehehe well put together. I lol'd when I found out what all that was actually about. EDIT: Posting in epic thread..... [Edited on 09.02.2009 7:24 PM PDT]
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    • change "previously mentioned" to "aforementioned" and then it looks like I had something productive to say. Either way..nice job. It'll be a while before I can sing that again.
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    • Thread saved for epicness.
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    • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Gold leader [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] CoffeeBlackMetal [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Gold leader Old.[/quote] At least 100 years ago, around last Thursday.[/quote]Just goes to show that the Flood is terminal cancer.[/quote] Just as much as Jamba Juice.
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    • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] CoffeeBlackMetal [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Gold leader Old.[/quote] At least 100 years ago, around last Thursday.[/quote]Just goes to show that the Flood is terminal cancer. [Edited on 09.02.2009 7:18 PM PDT]
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    • OP, the day is yours. You've won the internet. Yaaaaaaaay.
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    • [b][u]TEEHEE[/b][/u] *Scampers into the mist*
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    • Perfect.
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    • "over 9,000" copy pasta from /b/
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    • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Gold leader Old.[/quote] At least 100 years ago, around last Thursday.
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    • Old.
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    • You sir are Winner. I dare say it! You just Won The Game
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    • I'm saving this thread and archiving it in the Bungie.net Archive of Hilarity. You have earned yourself immortality, man!
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    • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Deus_Ex_Machina [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] squadingduck http://pack-duck.myminicity.com/ click it[/quote] Doesn't seem to do anything.[/quote]'' You aren't doin' it right.
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    • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] squadingduck http://pack-duck.myminicity.com/ click it[/quote] Doesn't seem to do anything.
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    • http://pack-duck.myminicity.com/ click it
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    • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] NKS22 Copypasta from ED.[/quote] You can't copy and paste text from a jpg image. It is a copypasta though, it's not my work. The spread of lulz is my work. <3 [Edited on 08.28.2009 4:15 PM PDT]
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    • Copypasta from ED.
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    • 0
      LOL! Lulz were had. Win.
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    • That was most amusing
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